I remember being ten years old, fresh out of my first elementary school situationship when I heard “Enchanted” blaring from my dad’s car stereo as he fixed my bike out back (The man likes hard rock and Taylor Swift. The man has taste). After that, I begged my mom to buy the entire album on her iPod and spent the rest of the day ear-deep in the sonic majesty that is Taylor Swift’s creative mind.
And now, after 13 years, Taylor Swift is releasing Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) this Thursday at midnight. In honor of this momentous occasion, I’ve compiled a list of snacks that represent each Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) song so you can enjoy the album with a satisfied stomach.
Mine (Taylor’s Version): Sweethearts Candy Hearts
Nothing says romantic ownership like “all mine” candy hearts.
Sparks Fly (Taylor’s Version): Pop Rocks
Pop Rocks mimic the sensation I experience when a funny guy with lusciously expressive eyebrows looks me dead in the eye and smiles.
Back To December (Taylor’s Version): Smarties
Smarties are the smart choice when filled with regret.
Speak Now (Taylor’s Version): Confetti Candy
This candy is traditionally thrown at Italian weddings and tastes awesome (not that I’ve picked any pieces off the floor and eaten them, or anything).
Dear John (Taylor’s Version): Jelly Belly’s BeanBoozled Beans
Jelly Belly’s BeanBoozled Beans always make you say to yourself, “wonderin’ which version of you I might get on the phone tonight.” Will I get Pomegranate or Old Bandage? Juicy Pear or Booger? Buttered Popcorn or Rotten Egg?
Mean (Taylor’s Version): Salt & Pepper Popcorn
I eat popcorn while watching the downfall of my haters with the extra negative energy.
The Story Of Us (Taylor’s Version): Cherry Slurpee
Cherry Slurpee says writing in your diary about the first date, having no money to spend, and fighting over things that feel so important but won’t matter in a week’s time. All the things you do when it’s your first relationship.
Never Grow Up (Taylor’s Version): Gerber’s Sweet Potato Turkey Power Blend
Gerber’s baby food is eaten by those “with nothing to regret.” Yet…
Enchanted (Taylor’s Version): French Macaron
To accompany the fanciest days stuck in your imagination.
Better Than Revenge (Taylor’s Version): Sour Patch Kids
Sour, then sweet. That’s Taylor in this song. No other way to describe it.
Innocent (Taylor’s Version): Ants on a log
Anytime I eat ants on a log, I remember my grandma and think, “wasn’t it easier in [my] lunchbox days?”
Haunted (Taylor’s Version): Sugar glass
I think there will be shards of sugar glass impeded in my gums until I die.
Last Kiss (Taylor’s Version): Chocolate strawberry clusters
This really only works if you suddenly become allergic to chocolate strawberry clusters. After one bite, you’re headed to the emergency room, never to consume strawberries and chocolate again. Much like, the last kiss, without the anaphylaxis (hopefully…).
Long Live (Taylor’s Version): Cotton Candy Dippin’ Dots
When you’re sitting around at night and wondering about your glorious future, dippin’ dot adds a futuristic comfort that pairs so beautifully with your dreams.
Ours (Taylor’s Version): Monkey bread
Monkey bread is a communal snack, eaten best during breaks in lovemaking.
If This Was a Movie (Taylor’s Version): Champagne and strawberries for one
This is a great snack to have while crying about the injustice of the world.
Superman (Taylor’s Version): Gatorade
It’s gonna be a while, waiting for him to change. You’ll need to stay hydrated.
Electric Touch (Taylor’s Version) (From The Vault): Jawbreakers
In honor of the Fall Out Boys and their 2000s vibes, suck on a jawbreaker while you wait for those headlights. It’s gonna be a while.
When Emma Falls in Love (Taylor’s Version) (From The Vault): Lavender Latte
It’s the drink that all the other lattes want to be. And when he drinks it, “the boy will never be the same.”
I Can See You (Taylor’s Version) (From The Vault): Grimace Shake
If you’re gonna drink one of these, prepare to keep it a secret. Or else…
Castles Crumbling (Taylor’s Version) (From The Vault): Melting popsicle
Your popsicle is always melting when your day’s work, this epic sandcastle, turns to ruin.
Foolish One (From The Vault) (Taylor’s Version): Slice of pumpkin pie
I always think pumpkin pie will taste like a sentimental Hallmark movie. It never does. I really am a fool for getting my hopes up every autumn.
Timeless (From The Vault) (Taylor’s Version): Butterscotch candies
These are the candies that always litter an antique store counter. I swear those exact candies have been there for twenty years and that makes me wonder about a butterscotch candy’s expiration date.