A beloved cookie responsible for plenty of heated debates, Oreos have surpassed their super-snack status and entered into the realm of scientific discovery. In a 2022 study called “On Oreology, the fracture and flow of ‘milk’s favorite cookie,'” researchers at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (MIT) twisted apart more than 1,000 classic Oreos in an attempt to achieve an ideal crème-to-wafer ratio.
Co-Author and Ph.D. candidate in mechanical engineering Crystal Owens said the study was inspired by personal frustration with her inability to get an even split of vanilla crème on two parallel wafers. Her consistent failure to enjoy exactly half the crème with either cookie called for a scientific intervention.
While the in depth experiment dove into physics, the flow of materials, and various splitting speeds well above my mortal understanding, Owens certainly made one thing clear: there is no other cookie worth such dedication. Even split or not, we conducted our own research on which Oreo flavor you should indulge in, based on your zodiac sign. Now all you need is a glass of cold milk, no rheometer required.
Aries (March 21 – April 19): Chocolate Strawberry Oreo
Courageous, confident, and determined, what better way to represent an Aries than the ultimate symbol of love? Chocolate creme with a strawberry center stuffed between two chocolate wafers, these cookies evoke fiery passion present in every Aries and deliver dynamic flavor worthy of their hard-earned praise.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20): Choco Chip Oreo
A lover of all things classic, a blend of the world’s two most famous cookies is perfect for a reliable Taurus. These limited-edition cookies featured Oreo’s first-ever dual-flavored wafer to nail the fresh-from-the-oven cookie look. Warm-hearted Tauruses will love nibbling on these delights while catching up with old friends.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20): Caramel Coconut Oreo
Two distinct flavors rolled into one, Caramel Coconut Oreos are the dessert version of a multifaceted Gemini. Curious and quick-to-learn, indecisive but lively, being two things at once means Geminis never have to choose between experiences — just like their cookie. Complete with chocolate, coconut, and a hint of caramel, it takes a certain type of person to fully appreciate the many elements of this Oreo.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22): Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup Oreo
You can’t go wrong with chocolate and peanut butter, especially when it comes to Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. Oreo teamed up with the iconic candy brand to create a cookie with half chocolate and half peanut butter creme on the classic chocolate wafer. Reminiscent of childhood trick-or-treating and Halloweens of past, these Oreos will drum up plenty of nostalgia for sentimental Cancers to munch on.
Leo (July 23 – August 22): Fudge Covered Mint Oreos
Leos love a little flare, which is why they require a fudge coating for their mint Oreo. An already delectable pairing of mint and chocolate, the additional chocolate exterior is a testament to both Oreo’s creativity and the innovative mindset characteristic of ever-evolving Leos. Not one for normalcy, Fudge Covered Mint Oreos match the exuberant nature we celebrate in Leos everywhere.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22): Oreo Thins Dark Chocolate Flavored Creme
A decadent treat without over indulgence, the double chocolate combo is the perfect pairing for any headstrong Virgo. Practical, meticulous, and reliable, these analytical thinkers will love the rich chocolate creme and delicate cookie and can boast about the health benefits of dark chocolate while digging in.
Libra (September 23 – October 22): Jelly Donut Oreo
Easy-going and ever the diplomat, Libras don’t like to make waves. In terms of their dessert preferences, these level-headed eaters would obviously go for a cherished American pastry: the jelly donut! A golden cookie with a jelly-flavored center, these sunny Oreos are a balanced bite of sweet and fruity best shared between sociable Libras by the dozen.
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21): Chocolate Hazelnut Oreo
Bold chocolate hazelnut creme sandwiched between two chocolate cookies delivers a Nutella-like delicacy enough to excite the most strong-willed Scorpio. Fearless in the face of adversity and in-touch with their many emotions, Scorpios do not shy away from impressive undertakings. A tried-and-true pairing is required to withstand such force, Oreos Chocolate Hazelnut more than weathers the storm.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21): Key Lime Pie Oreos
The taste of vacation packed into a single bite, Sagittarius can live out their globetrotting dreams with Key Lime Pie Oreos. Known to value freedom, friendship, and good vibes, this tangy dessert encapsulates the best of the Sagittarius spirit at a price more affordable than a plane ticket.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19): Oreo Thins Mint
Discipline and dedication are the name of the game when it comes to Capricorns. Considered the most prudent of the zodiacs, it makes sense that Capricorns would be unlikely to maintain a massive sweet tooth. A thin cookie with a less sweet (but no less delicious) mint filling a match made in heaven for highly-calculating Capricorns.
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18): Firework Oreos
Bold and ambitious, there’s no doubt that Firework Oreos capture everything Aquarius. A classic cookie made special with the addition of popping candies, these celebratory Oreos are just as powerful and independent as their astrology counterparts. Along with their vibrant Oreos, an Aquarius is sure to add a burst of energy to any social gathering.
Pisces (February 19 – March 20): Cinnamon Bun Oreo
Often an outlet for other’s emotions, Pisces are the epitome of comfort and compassion. Oreo’s rendition of an ooey-gooey breakfast pastry is like a warm hug from a trusted friend or an anecdote in times of need. A cinnamon cookie filled with a cinnamon bun-flavored creme, these Oreos have all the love with just the right amount of kick to render you a spicy Pisces.
A note: We think these flavors best represent each zodiac sign. However, some may have been limited-edition or only available during certain times of the year.