If you’re anything like me, you’ve shamelessly over-indulged in Ariana Grande’s fourth album Sweetener, and now it’s a part of your soul. The latest album’s blend of R&B flavors, Pop and allegedly Trap will pick you up and put you to sleep all in the same day. Grande’s multilayered confection soothes away our stress, savors the feels, and reminds us that she will always be there to bake more delights.
If only we could savor what Grande is serving us. What if we could actually taste the dreaminess of “R.E.M”? Or try whatever Grande is mixing and twisting up on the “sweetener” track? I may have been “Greedy” for every high note that was served from the Dangerous Woman album, but now I’m in touch with my sweet tooth. So here’s a selection of Grande’s tracks and desserts with a high sugar content matched by my own set of taste buds.
1.) raindrops: short, sweet, an angel food cake
Of course, Grande’s intro is going to have vocals from the heavens. Unfortunately, it’s a slim thirty-eight seconds. A low-fat angel food cake is a good fit, which means fewer calories that will leave us hungry for more.
2.) blazed: somehow one of grande’s favorites
Grande publicly stated on Twitter that “blazedddddd” made it to her favorites, and you know what, everyone’s got their own set of taste buds. For this track, here’s a delicious vegan brownie with avocado. Enough said.
3.) the light is coming: “sips tea, and it’s unsweet.”
Nicki Minaj got it right with that one. This song had so much potential. Even the biggest of Grande’s stans appreciated the beat, but the lyrics? The non-subtle chant of “You wouldn’t let anyone speak for this and instead-” killed whatever flavor could be salvaged. Here’s some pudding. It supports Grande’s vegan diet. Just remember to keep it sugar-free.
4.) R.E.M: “you’re such a dream to me.”
A light dessert that can come in any flavor you could dream of. Oh, and it’s dairy-free. As “R.E.M” embraces Grande’s new R&B flavor, we’re soothed into a dreamy, abundantly sugary sleep. An organic sorbet is a perfect choice for those who want to keep it sweet and simple.
5.) God is a woman: “and I, I feel it after midnight.”
That feeling? Sugar cravings. If only you could open the fridge and meet face to face with a lava cake. Instead, I recommend an Açaí bowl full of fresh, purposeful ingredients. A godly, healthier choice to fight the feeling you can’t fight. Also looks picture-worthy from any angle.
6.) sweetener: “twist it, twist it, twist it, twist it.”
“Mix it, and mix it, and mix it.” Macarons. They take a lot of work, hence all the mixing and twisting and loving that went into the entire album. Sure, a cake may work too, but this track is extra. The treat may be easy to mess up, but there’s a huge payoff in the end, and we’re eating it up.
7.) successful: “tonight, I’m a baller, babe.”
Basically, anything coated in 24 Karat gold is all yours. Ice cream, cake, cookies, just not doughnuts. Although the song’s beat is very catchy, the reminder that you’re not as successful as Grande may leave you feeling a bit salty.
8.) everytime: “I go back to you… back to you everytime.”
A song about being self-destructive by going back to your ex. This track is a bop and works into the idea of being a combination of different feelings: ice cream, meringue, and cake that’s inevitably set on fire. Baked alaska may be a complex dessert, but it tastes like pure bliss.
9.) breathin: “just keep breathin’ and breathin’ and breathin’.”
You are important. That’s why it’s best to eat whatever makes you feel your best. Grande’s “breathin'” opens up about how her anxiety has taken a toll on her following the tragic events at Manchester. Fans responded positively to the song, relating to both the suffering that comes with mental illness and the importance of the healing process.
10.) no tears left to cry: “I’m lovin’, I’m livin’, I’m pickin’ it up.”
The best bop of them all. Her hottest single has left everyone (especially me) shook. To stay in that blissful “state of mind” Grande is in, what’s better than the first bite of a cheesecake? Blueberry, Oreo, Peanut Butter, Caramel, whatever your heart desires, it’s there, to help you live your best life, in moderation.
11.) borderline: you’re gonna need this.
Again, another feature that’s a bit wonky. The track could be a lot better, it just hits a wall at the feature. To get through the part, have some of that ice cream Grande continues to reference. Specifically Cherry Garcia. The best flavor.
12.) better off: “I’m better off without him.”
Although I have complained about several features thus far, the remaining tracks weigh heavily on the feels. Grande uses an eloquent tone to reflect on a past toxic relationship. This track has a beautiful airiness, a harmony to remind us of how we need to cut ties to grow. Like a delicately sweet meringue that melts in your mouth. Oh, and they’re vegan.
13.) goodnight n go: “Just say goodnight and go.”
Aside from covering an Imogen Heap song, Grande’s voice creates a unique distinction. After a long night with someone-who-you-don’t-know-if-they’re-special-quite-yet, there’s a certain tension in the air. Sometimes it’s just better off to go home rather than stay the night at their place. In this case, Insomnia Cookies goes great with returning home at 2 am on an empty stomach. Plus, they deliver at TCNJ.
14.) pete davidson: “and I know that you’re my soulmate and all that.”
Grande expresses how the stars have aligned to bring Davidson into her life. If only this song was longer! They’re newly engaged, and they have no shame in hiding any aspects of their passionate relationship. What’s more mushy and romantic than a Valentine’s chocolate fondue for two?
15.) get well soon: “you can work your way to the top.”
The last track features Grande harmonizing on what it’s like being on “the top.” It’s stressful, scary, but it’s about the fans. Without them, she’d feel consumed by the lows of life. Praising her supporters, Grande wants us to take care of ourselves to live our best lives, therefore we should indulge in fruit for the most beneficial type of sweetness.
At the end of Sweetener, we have learned that Grande has grown immensely. By cherishing the power of sweetness, she has expelled the bitter and sour tastes that attempt to disrupt her wellbeing. Although messy at times, this album drips in raw talent, and has proven to me, yet again, that Ariana Grande will always be an exceptional artist.