Occasionally you’ll drop your silverware on the floor more than once in a meal or spill your drink across the whole table and the waiter will have to quickly reset everything. But do you ever wonder what your waiter is doing when you’re not looking? Well, I got the scoop from three different waiters who are planning on leaving their summers of waiting far behind them and you’re not going to believe it.
Disclaimer: I know there are incredible waiters out there who would never do these things, but these incriminating stories need to be told.
The Lies and Deception
The first waiter I talked to told little white lies to try to get bigger tips. Some of his go-to’s were telling his tables that the kitchen was slow whether or not it was—that way if the food came out late, he had already warned them. If it came out early, he could say he put their order on priority and they would praise him.
Another time he wasn’t truthful to the customers was around any holiday. The restaurant he worked had different deals like first round on the restaurant for Father’s Day. Instead of telling the dad’s that it was on the restaurant, he would say, “The first round for dads is on me!”
The dads usually eat it up and convince their wives to leave a bigger tip. If the restaurant ever found about this craftiness, they would be really upset, because the round is actually on them. Is this even legal?
What You’re Really Swallowing
The second waiter I talked to was straight up lazy and a little bit rude. He said he got lazy later on in his shift and wanted to clean one coffeepot rather than two. Around 8 pm, if you order a regular coffee, chances are you’re getting decaf. Waiters learn some good acting skills and will make you think that the tray of coffees they bring out have both decaf and regular.
And vegetarians, beware! This waiter admitted that if you ask if a soup is made with beef, chicken, or vegetable stock, waiters will almost always say vegetable. They don’t think you’ll be able to taste the difference and they want you to get that soup to start your meal so the bill is larger and their tip is bigger. And honestly, they would rather not go back into the hectic kitchen to ask.
Just EW
After I spoke to the last waiter, I was really starting to lose hope in humanity. He admitted to some real nasty stuff. Apparently, If they spot a bug in your drink before they bring it to the table, they’ll usually pluck it out with their finger and continue on like nothing happened.
Oh, and you want lemons in your water? Those things have not been washed and are not handled with gloves or utensils. So, the lemon that is soaking in your water has also been touched by at least two waiters — keep that in mind next time you eat out at a restaurant.
This isn’t just lemons, though—this could mean even your main meal. The waiter admitted to always snagging pieces of calamari or fries off your plate before they bring them out to you. Sometimes, even after you feel like you’ve finished your meal, they’ll take it to the back and do some more damage to it.
So, waiters, you have been exposed. But let’s look at the bright side: at least no one spits in our food. I hope that this new wealth of knowledge about the restaurant business doesn’t make you want to eat at home for the rest of your life. Happy eating!