Good-to-eat granny panties? Sweet thongs? Candy panties? No matter what you call them, we can all agree that edible underwear is a fun way to spice up your life. Back in the early 1970s, David Sanderson and Lee Brady hatched this genius edible underwear plan. They never really expected people to wear their product, appropriately named ‘Candypants,’ and saw it more as an art form than anything else. From the beginning, edible underwear was meant to bring smiles to the faces of the people around it.
Most of the time, these gifts are not highly praised, but if you’re in the market for some, I tried four different types of edible underwear so you didn’t have to—you can thank me later.
Couples Sweet Surrender – Bra, Panty, and Male Brief (Strawberry and Chocolate)
Taste: This one tasted the same way it looks: papery. Even though it was labeled as chocolate and strawberry flavored, it just tasted like paper and cardboard had a baby. The strawberry parts were soft and the chocolate tasted like you ate a Hershey’s kiss an hour ago. Overall, not the best.
Texture: The undergarments crinkled when you held them in your hands. The material is super thin, one of the strips broke when I attempted to tie the briefs together. This set was also VERY sticky.
Practicality: If I was going to use one of these products, Couple’s Set Surrender would not be the edible undergarment of choice. The thin material combined with the lacking flavors does not make this brand the winner here.
Sensuous With Taste: Edible Undies – Briefs (Passion Fruit)
Taste: One lick and I immediately knew what this reminded me of—a stale lollipop that had been left in my car for months. This product tries REALLY hard to be exotic, but simply falls short.
Texture: Once again, this product is made of a very thin material. While this is still very papery, it is stronger than the other material. It also had more of a shiny appearance.
Practicality: This is sturdier than the previously tested products, but still does not seem like it would do the job. After all, trying to enhance romance by wearing a fruit roll-up imposter is not the way to set the mood.
Edible Crotchless – Gummy Panties (Watermelon)
Taste: WOW. This one tasted like a typical watermelon gummy you can get from the local candy store. The crystals aren’t sour like one might think. This is definitely a sweet treat!
Texture: The gummy panties were stale and cracked in the packaging. If it was actually gummy, it would be a worth-while product.
Practicality: This product was very much DIY. It came with strings you tie into holes in order to put the product on. After you set it up, it seems like it could be a fun product to use.
Eat Me – Gummy Thongs and Bra (Delicious Strawberry)
Taste: The strawberry is very evident in this pair. The strawberry Twizzler undertones make this brand really enjoyable to munch on.
Texture: This gummy is really thick and heavy! It is a little sticky, but not enough that it would make uncomfortable.
Practicality: At first glance, this might seem a little small. You can stretch it out to make it fit however you want!
After this long journey, one thing is for sure: edible undergarments are not only for spicing up your love life—they can make a great snack, too! I leave you with a few words of wisdom: if you’re going to get edible undergarments, you gotta go gummy.
Disclaimer: Writing this article at the local deli turned a lot of heads, but hey, anything for good journalism!