Food for Thought
As soon as November 1st hits, all I can think about is Thanksgiving break… the whole family is together for the first time since who knows when, jamming to Christmas music in the kitchen is acceptable, and the food… oh, the food.
Choosing what side dish I want to put on my plate first is about as hard a decision as studying for finals or “forgetting” my textbooks at home. Then comes the question of how I go about eating: mix it all together this year? Stick to tradition and keep all foods separate? Stuff it all into a dinner roll and call it a day? I turn Thanksgiving into an equation comparable to that of the quadratic formula.
While I may not have my game plan for Thanksgiving prepared just yet, I have given much thought into what Thanksgiving food I would be if I were so blessed to be one (yeah, my brain has been that crazed this semester). While daydreaming about this during my Tuesday night statistics class, I decided to label the most popular majors with their respective foods as well; after all, the season of giving is right around the corner!
***disclaimer: your food does not define you <3
Nursing: Turkey
In the words of a future nurse practitioner, this major can simply be defined as “priceless, but exhausting.” One thing I love even more than the turkey itself is getting it for free at my neighborhood grocery store (shoutout to my mom for racking up 300 points on her rewards card). Second, we should know by now that the so called “food coma” we experience after the feast is not a myth! An amino acid called tryptophan, present in turkey, produces melatonin when metabolized. Melatonin is a hormone responsible for sleep regulation, giving us validation as to why eating on Thanksgiving is such an exhausting task (vegetarians stay woke).
Psychology: Homemade Mac n’ Cheese
It’s in your very nature to play games in the minds of those that cross your path, just like the irresistible bowl of mac n’ cheese on the dining room table. Are you a main course? A side dish? Are you even an official Thanksgiving food? Honestly, I will always be confused by you. While you may be a main cause of debate come meal time, you are always the one providing much needed comfort and understanding. When it seems like no one in the family gets you, there lies mac. Your aura is just like that of a warm hug from Great Aunt Debbie… always questioning one’s decisions but loving them regardless.
Criminal Justice: Roasted Brussels Sprouts
Disliked by some, needed by many. Sometimes your intentions are misunderstood or clouded over by controversies out of your control, but those who take time to invest in you are able to see the benefits you offer. It may take time to warm up to you, but when given a chance it’s clear that you just want to provide for the good of others. And that you do! When seasoned the right way and roasted like the true champ that you are, you may even end up being the star of the show (or Fox News).
Athletic Training: Stuffing
In order of highest priority to lowest, I rank the 3 F’s of Thanksgiving as follows: Family, Football, Food. Without you, trainees in training, we wouldn’t have the second- most important part of Thanksgiving and for that reason, I designate you as my favorite side dish. You sometimes go unnoticed in the larger scheme of things, but the fuel and support that you provide is a reason why this holiday is always a W in my book. Not only are you there for the main event, but I turn to you for recovery as you fit perfectly onto my leftover sandwiches.
Pre- Nutrition: Sweet Potato Casserole
The second someone hears that you’re a nutrition major, they are inclined to ask something along the lines of, “so, like, does that mean you don’t eat pizza?”. Similarly, hearing “sweet potato” makes someone think that you’re automatically a health freak. No, no, no, all sorts of WRONG. We still love the ooey- gooey marshmallows on top and will be the first tell you why you shouldn’t avoid any foods on this holiday. All foods fit!!! Side note, sweet potatoes are an excellent source of Vitamins A and C, so don’t worry if you forgot your daily-vits on the road trip gramps. 😉
Education: Spinach and Artichoke Dip
Without you, we wouldn’t make it to the main event! You are the perfect appetizer prepare for the big meal and while you scare kids off with your name, they’ll realize how grateful they are when they enjoy all of your benefits. Thank you for taking uneducated complaints with a tough skin and for providing those of us that appreciate your work with a reward of our own
Construction: Mashed Potatoes
You are [literally] what holds our lives together and give us a place to celebrate the best holiday of the year. Just like beams that provide stability to a house, mashed potatoes are the base ingredient for those who pull the ‘mix-everything-together’ move on Thanksgiving. Nothing holds five side dishes and a heaping pile of turkey together like a good ole’ scoop of skin on potatoes.
Pre-Med: Green Bean Casserole
You most likely chose this major for one of two reasons: your parents made you, or you genuinely love something that is so difficult for others to comprehend. I mean, Cream of Mushroom soup baked with green beans, topped with fried onions? It takes a brain like yours to understand why this works, but thankfully not one to enjoy the results. And if someone judges the not- so- aesthetically pleasing side on your plate, say your mom made you!
Marketing: Hard Cider
You’re a crowd pleaser and will find any way around the truth to make someone buy into any idea. Somehow you find a way to make every bad decision cousin Anthony made seem like a simple mistake and grandma’s burnt apple pie taste like heaven. While it may be false advertising, you have the buzz to fool us all and for that, we are thankful.
Political Science: Cranberry Sauce
The most controversial side dish of all. Are you better straight from the can or homemade? This debate is likely to cause dispute at the table and your opinion will likely be the one heard ’round the…errr… table. In the end however, you provide a topic other than how cute the newest baby in the family is. Everyone appreciates your presence whether they want to admit it or not (other than the baby’s mom, who is white- knuckling her fork right now due to lack of attention).
Performing Arts: Pumpkin Pie
You are, in all ways shapes and forms, the star of the show. You make everyone forget about the meal that they devoured hours before with your comforting yet irreplaceable flair and provide the perfect night cap. You make me feel less guilty for getting seconds because everyone loves an encore. Keep being you, boo.
Foreign Languages: Dinner Rolls
You’re very confused why you need to make an appearance on Thanksgiving; I mean, it’s 100% all- American. Bread makes an appearance at just about every meal, so if bread had a brain I think it would want a break, too. But just because the United States is the only nation celebrating today doesn’t mean you deserve to go unnoticed! Not only are you constantly adored (because, bread), leftover sandwiches wouldn’t be possible without you! Neither would the founding of this country, the people who make up our population, or the majority of foods that we eat on the daily. You know what, you’re actually the most important part of Thanksgiving. THANK YOU bread <3.
Undecided: Gravy
Speaking from experience as I was once the role of gravy in a school play, you have no idea where you belong just yet. It takes a lot of experimenting to answer that question, but in the end, you may have found the combination that you’ve never thought of before. Be curious. 😉