It's the most wonderful timeeeee of the yearrrrrrrr! I'm not talking about the holidays, though. I'm talking about darty season at The University of Alabama, which is upon us once again my dear, sweet friends.
We have another beautiful spring semester going on right now and as Bama students, it means we need to take full advantage of it. If you don't attend UA or if you love darty szn like I do, continue on to read a loving yet honest breakdown of what it means to darty in Tuscaloosa.
The Technological Term is "Darty"
Pronounced dar-tee. That's right, it's a combo of daytime and party because that's what it is: a daytime party. Brilliant, right? Fraternities throw darties in their front yards and in their courtyards on the weekends. These usually include a DJ or band and lots of crawfish and beer. At Alabama we don't mess with that northern term "dager." What is that anyway? A daytime rager? Sheesh, pump the breaks, we're not animals over here.
Time to Get Funky
If you have been itching to get experimental with your sense of style, darties are a great time to do so at UA. Some darty-approved attire are graphic or slogan T-shirts, jerseys or trendy outfits involving velvet or denim or whatever. A darty is like a free pass to wear whatever the hell you want, whether you're a guy, a girl or an alien. No one cares as long as you don't show up and kill their vibe.
Pregame That Thang
This is not amateur hour, treat a darty like any other respectable social occasion and pregame like you mean it. I like to get some mimosas going with some friends before we hit up the jungle of certain death that is a darty. Trust me, it's normal to be loose off the goose upon arrival. But under no circumstances is it OK to drink and drive, no matter how in control you think you are. Uber, joyride or even walk, don't be dumb.
Get Ready for Some Serious Puppy Action
Anyone who has a dog will most likely bring it out for a darty, so prepare for good dog lovin.' If you don't like hanging out with dogs, you may not like Alabama darties, honestly.
Instagram Becomes a Competition
There are typically several darties happening at the same time every weekend but without fail, there is always one fraternity that ends up having the biggest and best bash of all. No one knows which house it will be or why, it just works itself out somehow. Once this house is established it is suddenly everyone's sole mission in life to take the best instagram that proves they were there. Peep me in the photo above doing exactly that. I ain't got no shame wit it.
Snapchat is Also a Competition
Were you at that huge darty? Yeah, sure. Pics or it didn't happen. Everyone has to make sure their phones are out to capture the absolute mayhem that is a good darty.
Be Prepared to Rally for the Nighttime
Tuscaloosa has a pretty good bar scene going on and after a Saturday of day drinking, chances are you will stumble home around 4pm to rest before you do it all again at night. Before you nap though it's customary to gather what is left of your squad and hit somewhere that is quick and cheap for food like Moe's Southwest Grill or B-Phil's. After a sufficient nap just fix your hair and change your clothes and you're good to go for round two.
Guys, dig out that cut off tank top you made out of an old tee shirt and girls throw on some impractical sunglasses. It's time to get up and get down with some good ol' fashioned college fun in our very own front yards. I wouldn't do darty szn any other way. Roll tide.