Akshay Kumar is the fittest person in the film industry, and there’s no two ways about it. And I’m the laziest person to have been born, and there’s no two ways about that either. But since lazy doesn’t mean boring, I’m a sucker for adventure. Be it adventuring with sleep timings or food habits. This time it was food. Only for a day, I decided to adopt Akshay Kumar’s diet. I thought it’ll be a severe challenge since the fitness guru’s body screams healthy food. And boy, was I right. Well, more or less.
Breakfast (9:00 am)
2 Paranthas and Milk
I was stoked to be starting my day with these dishes, because I had been expecting something a lot more “healthier” (and we all know how unappetising healthy food is). These potato-stuffed paranthas were simple to make, consume, and fill my stomach, and weren’t at all alien to a potato like me. (In fact, they’re among my top-ranking dishes). I was just very relieved to know that my guru for a day was a strong opposer of protein shakes and bars and powders and whatnot. I felt I wasn’t ready just yet to become a large muscled douche whose clothes were close to ripping at the chest.
Snacks (11:30 am)
Fruits
Nuts
After about 2 hours, I was ready for a snack. Well, not me, but Akshay Kumar. I let go of my personal grudge with fruits, and ate a banana, and a few slices of apple. Next came a handful of nuts, which I didn’t mind. I like cashews and almonds, but in the chaos that is life, one tends to forget about them. As much as some people like to stress upon the extreme importance of nuts, I have a rather indifferent attitude towards them. If I remember to eat them, great. But if not, well then too bad for them. By this time I was feeling a bit too full, and apprehensive about the amount of lunch I’d be able to eat. I expended the energy from the food into walking (from the living room to my bedroom).
Lunch (2:00 pm)
Lentils, Veggies, 2 Chapattis, Salad, Chicken, Curd
I would like to take a moment here and thank my temp guru Akshay Kumar for not messing with my daily lunch. It saved me the stress of planning the time gap until my next meal, since my stomach was accustomed to this lunch and this timing. Lentils have been my enemy since forever, but since my mother worries about my protein intake, she has been forcing it down my throat every day. I had 2 chapattis with a mixed vegetable curry, lentils, salad, a couple pieces of chicken and curd. It is at moments like these that I realise what big foodies Indians are. Seriously, all this (and more) is food on the plate for one person. Needless to say, we still have some space left for dessert after every meal. Because dessert goes straight to the heart, doesn’t it? It took me a will of iron to avoid it this time, but I did.
Evening Snack (5:30 pm)
Juice
It was finally time for a snack. At this time, on the days when I’m not Akshay Kumar, I’m found stuffing my face with a glass of milk, biscuits, cake or just about any junk I can lay my hands on. I had to switch all of this for a glass of fresh juice, without any sugar. It was fine really, because I don’t mind juice once in a while. And since I had no plans to be Akshay Kumar the next day, I downed a glass of juice without complaining. However, I was deeply missing my dose of evening sugar. I tried to keep my mind off it though, by not browsing through social media where an accidental sighting of fried/sweet food was highly plausible.
Dinner (6:45 pm)
Soup, Salad, Sautéed Vegetables
The time for dinner may seem awkwardly placed to you, but believe me, I had it at exactly 6:45 pm according to my plan. This was the last and toughest lap of my diet plan for the day. So Akshay Kumar claims that the secret to his years and years of fitness is eating his last meal by 7:00 pm. 7:00 goddamn pm! My snack time alone sometimes extends till 7:00 pm. Family dinners don’t begin until after 10:00 pm. The party doesn’t start before 11:00 pm on a Saturday night. And here he was, not eating anything beyond 7:00 pm. The scientific theory he uses to support his regime is that the human body needs at least 3 hours to digest the last meal before it retires for the night. Therefore, eating early meant sleeping early which meant a healthier lifestyle and (I hate to admit) which meant my guru was ideally right. Therefore, I sat down to a light dinner at 6:45 pm, trying to push my dining time as further as I could within the limit. It was a light dinner consisting of only soup, salad, and sautéed vegetables. I had all this and was obviously left hungry AF. Thankfully, there was a back-up plan. According to Akshay Kumar, if hunger strikes post 7:00 pm, eat a carrot or scrambled egg whites. I ate both.
This diet plan was fine, until dinner happened. Dinner left me seriously “hangry”. I still have nightmares about this day..