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A Definitive Ranking of Valentine’s Day Chocolates, from Worst to Best

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at U Conn chapter.

Some of these Valentine’s Day chocolates are going to end up half-chewed and left in their box until March, and others will be gobbled up as soon as the top comes off. 

10. Cream Anything

Strawberry, raspberry, vanilla — take your pick. Fruit in chocolate is hotly debated (some people love it, some people hate it!), but a big ol’ bite of artificial strawberry flavoring is no one’s idea of a good time on Valentine’s Day.

9. Hidden Nuts

bulk nut walnut
Christin Urso

You’re halfway through a heart-shaped piece of milk chocolate when…crunch. Disguised as “clusters” by some candy companies, almonds, pecans, and cashews can now show up uninvited to your chocolate box. Hey, at least it’s not oozing fruit. 

8. The Fake Butterfinger One

Toffee, praline, brittle, whatever it is, it’s stuck in your teeth for hours. It’s overly sweet, a little sticky, and a bad copycat.

7. Coconut and Dark Chocolate

Again, a controversial one. Coconut and dark chocolate are just two things people like to say they love, but come on, we all know milk chocolate is 100% yummier than only 86% cacao! This one probably tastes fine, but a little too #extra for a classic chocolate assortment.

6. Truffles

Valentine's Day chocolate chocolate candy
Emily Hu

No, not the uber-expensive delicacy or the thing Nicki Minaj sang about. Truffles are fancy schmancy chocolate balls with a creamy, chocolate center, usually rolled in nuts or cocoa powder. Not the worst, but, just like, eat a piece of chocolate. 

5. Chocolate With Mint

A little too reminiscent of Andes after-dinner mints. There’s a time and a place for these chocolates (see: after-dinner), but besides feeling fresh after a big meal, it’s a no-go.

4. White Chocolate

The underdog chocolate in a sea of brown. But what is it, really? A nice touch in a chocolate assortment, but easily forgotten about.

3. Chocolate With Marshmallow

Backpacking candy marshmallow
Kelley Buck

Chocolate-covered marshmallow fluff with a cookie layer underneath is a standard. Not the most grownup chocolate in the box, but pop a few of these in your mouth after eating a truffle, and everything balances out.

2. Chocolate-Covered Sea Salt Caramels

Sure, it’s very trendy to slap the words “sea salt caramel” on any product, but it’s a combination that deserves a little bit more of our love. They’re salty, they’re sweet, and luckily, they all look the same.

1. Chocolate with peanut butter

Valentine's Day chocolate peanut butter peanut
Libby Perold

The ultimate combination. Peanut butter and chocolate are just meant to be together, like you and your Valentine! 

Leah Sheltry

U Conn '20