Forget the old “boys are so hard to understand.” You can spot what a guy wants from you by one thing: where he takes you to eat.
One Night Stand: Pita Pit
You just met the “OMG cutest boy ever… no forreal” at a frat party and he asks if you’re hungry. Your answer?: “Sure.” And of course the, “I’m down for whatever since I just met you and am willing to leave with you” is implied.
He takes you on the short walk from his frat on Walnut to the food places on Marshall and you go for a drunk bite of something that is fast and decently cheap: Pita Pit.
Afterwords, he makes his move. He says, “My apartment?” and of course, as you implied earlier, you’re “down for anything.” So, you go.
After he paid a whopping less-than-ten dollars for your pita and had a fun night with you in his apartment, mystery frat boy is never seen again.
You realize: his personality was as mediocre as the packaged pita, yet somehow he still left you wanting more like the after taste of a big bite of hummus.
Schoolwork Help: Strong Hearts On The Hill
You are convinced this boy in your math class is sitting next to you because he MUST be into you, not just because you’re getting an A.
After helping him in class with the difference between independent and dependent variables, you think he’s finally got it. Right after, he asks, “Do you want to meet for lunch tomorrow?” You ask, “Where?” and he says, “I love Strong Hearts in Marshall Square Mall.”
When you get to Strong Hearts, you notice he doesn’t know his kale from his tofu. This is when he also mentions to you that he STILL can’t determine the X-axis from the Y-axis.
Conveniently, there are tables open upstairs in the study section of Marshall Square Mall and he motions for you both to sit there. Even more conveniently, he happened to have brought his backpack. Most conveniently, he has a few questions already prepared for you.
When you finish with your tutoring, you see him smile. Is it because he wants to go on another date? Nah. It’s probably because he won’t need another one.
Brief Fling: Modern Malt
Thee time has finally come. The boy you have been seeing for a few weeks offers for you to spend the night at his apartment… SOBER! After informing all of your girl friends, you pack your bag and throw in an outfit for tomorrow. Who knows what he has planned for you two?
You had such an amazing night and you wake up feeling sure that he will want to spend the day with you. He wakes up and says, “I’m hungry, let’s get breakfast at Modern Malt.” You head out.
Breakfast was delicious. But, suddenly he seems like he is in a rush. He drops you back at your place and you don’t talk for the rest of the day until you finally text him the following day.
You realize he probably does not want a relationship and is just in it for a brief period of time. You’re another one of his “flings.”
If it wasn’t this way, maybe he would have hung with you until at least lunchtime.
In a Relationship: Bleu Monkey
This one is self-explanatory because sushi dates are obviously #relationshipgoals.
The boy you have been with for what seems like awhile now has asked you on a nice date and says he wants to talk about something. Things have been going well, so you assume he may make whatever you have official.
After dipping your California Roll into your soy sauce, you look up and notice him staring at you. You say, “What?” and he says, “Will you be my girlfriend?”
You choke a little on your excessive amount of wasabi and manage to murmur, “Of course!”
What better place for your “My boyfriend<3" insta than a classic Cuse sushi bar?
The Proposal: The York
It’s the end of your Senior Year at Cuse. You can’t believe a few things: 1. You’re almost done with college, 2. You are basically an adult (scary), and 3. You have been dating your boyfriend since Freshman Year and he still hasn’t brought up what you two will do after you graduate.
He asks you to the restaurant you had your first real date at: The York. Here, you shared the s’mores dip 4 years ago and fell in love at first chocolatey bite.
After dinner, you order the dessert just like old times. Once you get halfway through it, you notice something shining in the middle of the pot. You take it out, clean it off, and realize it is a wedding ring. Your boyfriend gets down on one knee and says, “Will you marry me?”
You scream a marshmallow mouthful of, “Yes!!” and make a toast to how it all really does work out in the end.
No matter how many less-than-enjoyable restaurant and dating experiences you’ve had in your past, things seem to find a way of coming together.