It’s been said that “time heals all wounds,” but we’re impatient and want instant consolation. Sometimes it’s necessary to eat a pint of ice cream and cry your heart out. Ben and Jerry’s ice cream is a great option if waiting around isn’t your thing.
Time to find out which ice cream will ensure a speedy recovery for you and your broken heart.
1. Cheated On: Half Baked
Photo by Becky Hughes
This is by far the most popular reason for a breakup. Therefore, it deserves the most popular B&J Flavor: Half Baked. Being cheated on is tough, but this smooth ice cream will remind you of the unrocky road ahead.
Can’t decide between chocolate or vanilla? Half Baked has both, and some sweet fudge brownies and cookie dough bits. Stick with Half Baked B&J, they’ll never cheat on you.
2. Long Distance: Hazed & Confused
Photo by Amanda Shulman
What? I thought we both decided to try this long distance thing. You might feel like the world is plotting against you and your lover. It is hard and confusing to love someone; especially when they are hours away. Hazed & Confused has all the yummy fudge bites you’ll need to get clarification on why the distance was too much.
3. Age Difference: Everything But The…
Photo by Julie Rub
This is a tricky one. Everyone grows up at different rates. Sometimes you mature faster than your significant other, and sometimes it’s the other way around. Let out your inner child, stomp your feet, and try Everything But The…. Ben and Jerry’s flavor.
Everything But The… has everything you could ever imagine, including chocolate and vanilla ice cream, peanut butter cups, almonds, white chocolate chunks, and chocolate-covered toffee bits. Go grab a pint.
4. Too Clingy: Chubby Hubby
Photo by Julie Rub
Everyone needs their own space. When your boyfriend or girlfriend becomes too clingy, sometimes you feel suffocated and have to break it off. You and your lover need some time apart. But, just because you are going through a rough patch right now, doesn’t mean you won’t get back together.
In fact, eHarmony has a guaranteed list on how to get your ex back. That’s why the Chubby Hubby flavor with vanilla malt ice cream, peanut fudge-covered pretzels, and peanut butter swirls is what is going to get you through this hard time.
5. Too Busy: S’mores
Photo courtesy of benjerry.com
Too busy? If you all really were meant to be together, he or she would spend more time with you. S’mores flavor is going to get you through the night. You may feel that you want s’more of your bae, but really you need to let go — it’s just not happening.
6. Didn’t DTR Soon Enough: Blondie Ambition
Photo courtesy of benjerry.com
DTR means to define the relationship. College hook-up culture makes this breakup reason happens more often than you think. Not all college students know what they want. If you and your bae didn’t define the relationship before you broke it off, it means there was no relationship to define.
Blondie Ambition is the way to go. Be ambitious, find the one for you… right after you eat this pint of butterscotch ice-cream, blondie brownies, and butterscotch toffee pieces.
7. No Reason: Cake My Day
Photo courtesy of benjerry.com
It happens. One day you just wake up and your significant other has decided they don’t want you anymore. Well, that came without warning and now you feel knocked off your feet. With cake batter ice cream, vanilla cake bites, frosting and raspberry swirls, Cake My Day is going to turn your entire day around.
So what if they broke up with you? Clearly they don’t know what they had, and you can feel better Netflix and chilling with your Ben and Jerry’s ice cream.
8. Just Not Feeling It Anymore: Chocolate Therapy
Photo courtesy of benjerry.com
Who doesn’t hate this excuse? We all know there is a reason, just tell us what it is. You don’t think we can handle it? Yeah, right.
When your significant other leaves you in this mysterious dust, you can’t help wondering why they chose to break things off. Chocolate Therapy is the only way to go. There’s no mystery that there is chocolate everything in this pint.
When your boyfriend is either Ben or Jerry, you don’t have to worry about them “not feeling it anymore.” They will always be there to offer you a sweet treat when you’re feeling salty about your breakup. Turn on the breakup songs, eat your ice cream, and before you know it, you’ll be moving on.
You can count on Ben and Jerry’s for a breakup, but these two guys are useful for many other situations. Find out here.