Ah, the college party scene. These four years can be a great time, but sometimes those great times can be taken a little too far. Whether you’ve taken one too many tequila shots, slapped the bag for just a second too long, or have actually fallen off the bar you were dancing on top of, someone out there can definitely relate. To make you feel slightly less embarrassed of your less-than-graceful moments, here is a list of #cringeworthy college party stories.
#SpoonTip: Spoon University does not support binge drinking or underage drinking. While many of these stories may be funny, most weren’t at the time. Please drink responsibly, friends!
1. Slap That Bag
“So I went to a frat party TOTALLY feeling myself. I was hitting on hot guys left and right and pretty sure a guy asked for my number. Then, my good friend spots me from across the room and says, “YOU NEED TO SLAP THE BAG.” With all the focus now on me, I slapped that bag as hard as I could and just kept chugging Franzia like it was my job. Immediately when I finished, I felt the wine bubble in my stomach and I turned away from my friends proceeding to throw up everything I had drank that night on the frat’s floor.” – student at Denison University
2. A Real Sh*tty Situation
“A girl sh*t on the floor in this house party and people were accidentally stepping in it, and they had to burn the couch.” -student at The University of Findlay
3. #PaintGirl
“A girl came to the Sigma Chi frat house and f*cked it up. She dumped paint on herself and ran through the house, [ruining] parts of the house and people’s clothes.” – student at Kent State University
4. Just the Best DFMO
“We saw this girl flirting with my friend’s ex-boyfriend at the bar. Her and her friend went to the bathroom, so we obvi followed them just to see who she was. They were both way too intoxicated and were taking turns throwing up. THEN, they were freaking out because neither of them had gum. We saw them later in the night on the dance floor and SHE WAS MAKING OUT WITH THE EX-BOYFRIEND right after throwing up.” – student at The University of Alabama
#SpoonTip: If you ever see someone at a bar or out at a party who looks like they need to go home or seek medical attention, don’t be afraid to call for help! In many states, medical amnesty laws will protect your and/or them from getting in trouble. But either way, play it safe and make the call.
5. OU Oh Yeah!
“Last weekend after the big McGregor vs. Mayweather fight, I ran around campus screaming, ‘CONNORRRR MCGREGORRRR YOU SEXY A$$’ after he had just lost.” – student at Ohio University
6. Pledge Party Gone Wrong
“My first ever pledge party was a HOT mess. I was so excited, so I drank like two bottles of wine during our pre-pregame and blacked out before the real pregame was over (which I highly recommend not doing). When we finally got to the party, I was so drunk I could barely walk down the stairs. When I started to come to it, I realized that I had ripped people’s shirts open and told them, ‘It looks prettier that way.’ (I ripped like six people’s shirts). My friend took me home at 10:30 pm and made me ramen, which I spilled all over myself, and I broke my Brita water pitcher.” – student at Denison University
7. “Study Abroad,” They Said. “It’ll Be fun,” They Said.
“The most embarrassing story (so far) of my college party career is when I was wandering around the streets of Mykonos at like 4 am after a night of clubbing, and got hit by a Greek man on an ATV (I may or may not have been intoxicated). When the bruise on my leg eventually formed, it covered half of my thigh and you could see the tire marks.” – student at St. Mary’s College of California
8. The Not-So-Happy Birthday
“On my 19th birthday, I went into a bar screaming, ‘It’s my birthday! It’s my birthday!’ All of this occurred while I was handing the bouncer my (fake) ID that obviously had a different birthday date on it. I got denied so hard.” -student at Ohio University
9. Wine Night Takes a Tumble
“I went to a frat’s wine and cheese night last year and blacked out on solely wine bags. I remember stepping out of the frat house, but blacked out again in my dorm after taking more shots. I then scrapped the sh*t out of my knees after falling down the stairs, and three random girls took me back to my room. I spent the next day DMing people on Insta trying to find out who brought me home. A few days later, a random girl asked me how my knees were doing… I still have the scars a year later.” – student at The Ohio State University
10. Remember to Tuck and Roll
“One time I took way too many shots and was so drunk that my friends called me an uber. As they were driving, I thought I was going to puke, so I jumped out of the moving car and landed on cement. Then, I jumped into a bush because I thought the police were coming.” – student at Denison University
11. Don’t Tell the Uber Driver
“I threw up in my purse one time in an Uber and the driver never knew.” – student at NYU
12. Making Friends with Campus Security
“My first time blacking out was my first month of college. I accidentally took my guy friend’s drink, who had gotten QB sneaked that night. After just a few sips, I jumped out the window of the frat party (first floor) and ran right into campus security. When he gave me a strange look and asked if I had too much to drink, I started to say no but threw up all over him.” -student at Denison University
#SpoonTip: If you think you or someone you know has been drugged, stick with someone you trust and call for help right away. This is serious, and totally not funny.
13. Somebody Call the Po Po
“One time I was completely blacked while visiting my friend at school. I was so gone that I had to be carried home, but we were stopped by police before we got back. The police literally witnessed me being carried home… When they approached us, I resurrected from the dead and SOMEHOW managed to convince them that I was fine. I woke up the next morning with bruises EVERYWHERE, even my forehead from leaning into the toilet. And somehow my phone ended up at the police station.” – student at Miami University
#SpoonTip: PEOPLE, seriously, please drink responsibly.
Moral of the story: The college party scene can be pretty cringeworthy. That being said, it’s definitely important to take care of yourself and your friends while partying in college. Drinking stories can be funny, but it’s not funny when someone actually gets hurt, or worse. Know your limits and don’t be afraid to take a weekend off every once in awhile to catch up on sleep, homework, and Netflix.