Anything can be made simple when you explain it through food – personalities, college majors and yes, even guys. And what late-night food chain do Duke students love more than anything to satisfy their 2 am milkshake cravings? That’s right, Cookout. Everyone has their go-to Cookout milkshake, just as every girl, whether she likes to admit it or not, has a type, so why not combine the two? Here are the 7 guys you’ll meet at Duke, according to Cookout Milkshakes.
Vanilla – The “So This Summer at My Goldman-Sachs Internship…” Guy
If you’ve spent at least five minutes on campus, chance’s are you’ve met this guy. Recognizable by his Vineyard Vines button down, Nantucket reds and boat shoes, he’s a Duke classic, just like a vanilla milkshake. Some may say vanilla shakes are “stereotypical,” and “unoriginal,” but you can’t deny that they are a timeless staple of Cookout.
Peanut Butter Banana – The Secret Frat Star
This guy has an air of mystery around him. Is he in a fraternity? Is he not? Your roommate swears she saw letters on his hat, but, then again, you’ve never seen him outside of Perkins. Except fort that one time at that one party — was that a coincidence? He has a hidden layer that is known only within a close circle of friends, just like this peanut butter banana shake. At first glance, you might think it’s merely an innocent banana milkshake, but it’s got an unexpected peanut butter kick to it. Who doesn’t love a good mystery anyways?
Double Chocolate – The Not-So-Secret Frat Star
With a white t-shirt with his letters on the frocket, khaki shorts, and probably a sorority hat for good measure, there’s nothing subtle about this guy. He’s bold and intense just like the double chocolate milkshake. Sure you could just get regular chocolate, but double chocolate is stronger and that means its better, right? Make sure to get your wristband and be able to name at least 5 other Cookout menu items before ordering!
Cappuccino M&M Caramel Fudge Oreo – The Engineering, CompSci, Math Triple Major on the PreMed Track
This guy is quite literally the busiest man on all of campus. He schedules social time with friends in his Google Calendar like meetings. He averages three hours of sleep a semester. He’s been overloading his courses since middle school. Like the customized cappuccino M&M caramel fudge Oreo shake, this guy has a lot on his plate and is 1/4 coffee.
Mint Chocolate Chip – The President… of Everything
Every time you log onto Facebook he has a profile picture soliciting your vote for another organization and your notification center is full of event invites from him. He’ll ask you to reschedule lunch at least twice a week because he’s sorry, but something came up with DSG/DUU/IFC/HC last minute! Always one of the most popular people in the room, he is described best as a mint chocolate chip milkshake. And that green color? That’s for all the money he is going to make someday as the president of a major company.
Strawberry – The Permanent Perkins Resident
It doesn’t matter if you’re in the line for Vondy Pumpkin Bread or having an existential crisis on the fourth floor, you see this guy everywhere in Perkins. Chances are you’ve never formally met, but you feel that sense of solidarity when its past two a.m. and you see him a few cubicles away. Like a strawberry shake, he is dependable and a constant Duke menu item.
Fresh Banana- The High School Athlete Who Could’ve Played Varsity at Duke if He’d Wanted To.
Still wearing his team sweatshirt from his #seniorszn, this guy wants you to know that he was – is still- a student athlete. He likely takes his intramural sports team way too seriously and never misses an opportunity to tell you why he chose not to play at the varsity level. Because he could’ve done that. Really, he could’ve. A little overbearing at times and also a health nut, this guy is just like the fresh banana shake. Of course, he could’ve been Oreo, but he chose banana for his own personal reasons. But seriously, he could’ve been Oreo if he’d wanted.
So grab your spoons and go ahead and sample the 7 types of guys you’ll meet at Duke!