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Lifestyle

Jello Shots 101: An Essential Guide to Picking Your Alcohol

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at Yale chapter.

Jello shots are a glorious combination of childhood innocence and college trashiness. Plus, who doesn’t like an all-in-one shot and chaser? So efficient.

Introduction: an investigation into which alcohol works best for jello shots

While vodka is generally the standard alcoholic base, Spoon’s scientific experiment will put that standard to the test and determine once and for all which booze makes the best jello shots.

Aim: 

Take one for the team (and the liver) and determine if vodka really is the best alcohol for jello shots.

Hypothesis:

Vodka– particularly cute, fruity-flavored vodka— is the preferred alcohol in jello shots for a reason

Equipment:

hide your hangover ice wine
Jaime Wilson

Jell-O (we used green, sorry world); Vodka (plain/flavored); Tequila; Rum; Wine; Whiskey; Beer (etc.)

Variables:

Independent: type of alcohol

Dependent: rating out of 10

Controls: Jell-O flavor, taste testers, environmental conditions, sobriety (maybe)

Method:

Jello Shots beer tea
Hana Davis

1. Load up on carbs to prevent premature drunkenness. 

2. Mix hot water, Jell-O powder and substance of choice.

3. Refrigerate everything for 2-4 hours.

4. Knock back– I mean, sample– results.

Results:

Jello Shots coffee beer
Hana Davis

New Amsterdam Vodka 5/10  

Standard, serves as a control variable.

Mango-Pineapple Svedka – 3/10

“Nope, not good… it tastes like cough syrup.”

“I wouldn’t buy this nor even consume it for free.”

Bacardi Rum –   6/10 

“You can’t even taste the alcohol! It’s much better than expected, waaaay better than vodka.” 

Franzia Merlot –  9/10  

“It’s really good, like sweet wine but congealed, which, granted, doesn’t sound very good but wow.”

“This is the jello shot you’d eat as a snack while doing your readings.”

Budweiser Beer –  8/10      

“While there’s no point in drinking beer like this, I would prefer it to regular jello because there’s a nice carbonation to it.”

“The beer complements the lime flavor. It’s like a Budlight Lime”

Tequila –  4.5/10    

“It’s fine if you like tequila, but a straight shot with salt and lime is far superior.”                                

“Even a plain shot is better. Gross.”

Jello Shots tea coffee
Hana Davis

Honey Jack Daniels – 2/10   

“The honey throws you off. It’s terrible with the lime.”

“It’s better than straight whiskey, but that’s not saying much.”

Evaluation and Conclusion:

The tequila should have worked well with lime jello, but unless you’re into straight tequila, this was a funky flavor combination. With tequila, the jello would be best served as a separate chaser.

Mango-Pineapple vodka probably works when you’re not using lime jello, but with the green comes a tendency to go with the classic– plain vodka. Whiskey is horrific and rum is surprisingly decent.

In conclusion, while rum is the best bang for your buck in terms of alcohol content, beer and wine were the best taste-wise. 

I love peanut butter, steamed buns, dumplings and Chinese vegetables. Also, I am hopelessly clumsy and as a result, you will never see me without bruises (my friends have suggested permanently bubble-wrapping me as a method of countering this). I almost exclusively follow food Instagram accounts, I fall in love with random dogs on the street, I am compulsively overenthusiastic in emails and I have a fear of fish in enclosed spaces, farm birds, and fingernails touching.