We’ve all been there before: you pop off the cork of a brand new bottle of wine, telling yourself you’ll just have one glass. But after you take that last sip, the emptiness of the glass just seems so depressing. Before you even realize it, your hand tips the bottle and pours yourself that second glass. Suddenly you find yourself in a dilemma. “Should I really drink this whole bottle?”
Yes, you can drink the whole bottle. And you should. Here are 25 reasons why.
1. You really need an excuse for texting your ex-boyfriend.
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2. You did really well on an exam and want to celebrate.
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3. You did really shitty on an exam and want to forget.
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4. Your hookup is coming over later and you need to give yourself that extra drunken confidence that you had last Friday night.
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5. Antioxidants, am I right? Don’t know what those are, but apparently they’re super good for you…
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6. God forbid your wine goes bad.
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7. You haven’t quite picked up on those subtle cranberry undertones that are supposed to be present in the wine. You’ll probably need to drink the whole bottle to get a feel for the “essence” of the wine.
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8. It’s Wine Wednesday, so duh.
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9. It’s Thirsty Thursday and a whole bottle seems like it’s the only thing that can satisfy your thirst.
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10. It’s Sunday and you want to honor the communion.
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11. Because wine glasses like this exist.
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12. You need a companion for your next 3 hours of Netflix-binging.
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13. It’s your whole pregame in a single bottle—no need to bring multiple bottles of alcohol and chasers.
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14. Your boyfriend just broke up with you, but at least your wine never suffers from performance issues.
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15. Your French-speaking abilities improve vastly after a couple of glasses and you have an exam next week.
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16. You’re a SWUG.
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17. A glass bottle of wine a day keeps the doctor away.
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18. You’re working up the liquid courage to text him first.
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19. You don’t have class until 11 am tomorrow.
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20. Eh, you can skip that 11 am class.
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21. A bottle fuels your late-night venting and philosophical discussions with your friends at 3 am.
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22. If you drink enough wine, it tastes like love.
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23. Committing to a whole bottle proves that you actually don’t have commitment issues. See, mom!
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24. You need motivation for ___________ (fill in any mundane task here).
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25. I mean, you’re already halfway done anyway. No point in backing out now.
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Need more convincing? Check out these links below: