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The 9 Guys You Meet in College as Food in Gainesville

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at UFL chapter.

Throughout your time in college it’s more than likely that you will come across all different types of guys. Ultimately, we begin to label them in our minds based off of common personality traits, so why not have a little fun with it? Here are all the boys you’ve met in college as told by the Gainesville food scene.

Shitty but Convenient: Subway

Gainesville

Photo by Amanda Shulman

It seems as if every corner you turn on this campus, Subway is always there. We never actively pursue Subway. We never make lunch plans with Subway. We simply end up at Subway. Subway is the guy who is absolutely nothing special but always seems to be around at the most convenient of times.

Cute and Reliable: Pascal’s Coffeehouse

Gainesville

Photo by Deana Sarshory

You first became study buddies in calculus, then slowly but surely you built up a foundation of trust and realized you could go to him for anything. He’s nerdy, he’s sweet, and he’s always there for you. Pascal’s Coffeehouse, with its kindhearted aesthetic and assorted flavorful lattes, makes for the perfect study date location with a guy like this.

Hot and Foreign: Emiliano’s

Gainesville

Photo by Jayna Goldstein

You never really know what he’s saying, but you want to. You can’t identify the exotic flavors but you love them regardless. There’s something about the colorful tastes of Emiliano’s that makes you want to hop on the next plane to Latin America.

The Best One Night Stand You Ever Had: Relish

Gainesville

Photo by Jen Baron

You bumped into him at a bar and ended up dancing the night away. You seem to have really connected, so you decide to take a walk on the wild side and go home with him. Like this decision, there is no regret involved with Relish, the perfect burger tailored to your liking is exactly what you need to satisfy your taste buds.

Douchey in Every Way Possible: Gumby’s Pizza

Gainesville

Photo by Jenna Rosen

He’s always texting you about his frat’s newest party, asking if you’re going out to mid on Tuesday nights, and sending you snapchats at 2 a.m. asking you to come over. He is the human equivalent to Gumby’s Pizza, the poor-quality food that seems to effortlessly appear at your doorstep after a failed night out.

Trendy and Mysterious: The Jones

Gainesville

Photo by Jayna Goldstein

You met him at that one slam poetry night you and your friends decided to check out, and he was the one pondering life in the corner that seemed darker than the rest of the room. He’s the musician you dated for two weeks before realizing you have absolutely nothing in common. The Jones is dark, edgy, and has all the vegan options ones heart could desire, a perfect fit for your guy.

The Surfer Guy: 3Natives

Gainesville

Photo by Jocelyn Gordon

He’s the one wearing surf shorts year-round, even those two weeks when it drops below 50 in Gainesville. Every week, he’s crying about the fact that UF is two hours from any kind of waves and is constantly inviting you on his surf club trips. He’s all for living that green and healthy lifestyle, even if it costs upwards of $8 a pop.

Perfect but Unattainable: Dragonfly

Gainesville

Photo by Esther Khoudari

Fact: Ryan Lochte used to take dates to Dragonfly. Enough said.