Though I was slightly late to the Harry Potter scene, I can thank my freshman dorm, Donner, for opening my ignorant eyes to one of the best series there is with our theme of “GryffinDonner.” Much like us Stanford students, the Harry Potter characters constantly scheme for the best bites the campus, or Hogwarts, has to offer. And even more like us, they all have their favorites — the places they find sanctuary amidst their yearly exams in the form of food.
Harry Potter: CoHo
The go-to for coffee, quality food, coffeehouse vibes, and mediocre entertainment. CoHo is an all-around classic eatery, on Stanford’s campus, much like Harry Potter — the total package. Catch him perfecting his Patronus with a side of a Club House sandwich, or indulging in a latte over his Potions textbook. Harry Potter is to Hogwarts as CoHo is to Stanford — essential.
Hermione Granger: Stanford Bookstore Café
Given that Hermione spends nearly half of her time with her nose in a book, she would definitely do the same in the Stanford Bookstore Café. The balcony view allows her to look down on her lesser read peers and relish in the scholarly atmosphere as she sips on her Berry Hibiscus Iced Tea.
Ron Weasley: Coupa Café
Similar to the procrastinating half of us students here at Stanford, Ron spends more of his time outside Hogwarts Library than than inside. So, naturally you would be able to find him at the Coupa Café outside of Green Library, chowing down on the best food combination there is — a breakfast sandwich.
Neville Longbottom: Forbes Family Café
Despite his seemingly endless blunders, Neville excels in an area that not many other wizards do: Herbology. Thus, the trendy, plant-forward Forbes Family Café is the place for him. From their stellar salad bar and warm paninis to their impressive Pho and daily special options, Forbes sources all of their ingredients locally. Neville would be here, studying Herbology with his taste buds.
Draco Malfoy: Arbuckle Café
It is no secret that the Malfoy family takes the crown for token snobs of the wizard world, so Draco would definitely spend a little too much time attempting to surpass his peers by networking at the GSB in the Arbuckle Café. Find him here pairing his expensive Nimbus 2001 Broomstick with his Mango Curry Chicken, sans meal plan dollars because #GSBlife.
Albus Dumbledore: The Faculty Club
Excellent teaching necessitates excellent taste — that is why Stanford’s finest dines at the Stanford Faculty Club. Dumbledore’s wisdom lands him alongside the academia elite, so he undoubtedly would munch here. Eloquently conversing with scholarly giants, Dumbledore would relish in the ravish creations crafted by the renowned Faculty Club chefs.
Hagrid: Treehouse
It may not be butterbeer at the Three Broomsticks, but pitchers at Treehouse is the closest pub-like place that campus has to offer to Hagrid. Coupling their selection of brew is an extensive menu ranging from pizza to stir fry — everything to meet your pre- or post-game munchies. Bond with Hagrid over sports and a pitcher. Or two. Or three.
Severus Snape: Arrillaga Family Dining Commons
Severus Snape is like Arrillaga Family Dining Commons (a.k.a. Llags) — mundane to the eye, but high quality on the inside. Once you get over the gloom of the room, the sight of students slaving over p-sets due yesterday, and the sound of glass breaking as another seemingly out-of-place child drops a plate, the chef-prepared, buffet-style food is pretty damn good. Snape’s sneer would fit in with the Llags scene.
Fred & George Weasley: The Axe & Palm
A night at the Axe & Palm (a.k.a. TAP) never fails to induce a few laughs, which is why Fred and George would be seen their cracking jokes and wreaking havoc akin to their Weasleys’ Wizards Wheezes joke shop. Though minus the chocolate frogs and puking pastilles, Fred and George definitely would be scarfing down chicken tendies, the new Impossible Burger, and don’t forget about the milkshake.
Ginny Weasley: Olives Café
You can always count on Ginny as a friend — and on Olives Café in the basement of Building 160 to give you a tasty Mediterranean meal worthy of your meal plan dollars. She would likely enjoy lunch with Harry in between her busy schedule of classes and Quidditch practice because Olives and Coho go hand in hand regarding their culinary styles.
Luna Lovegood: Heritage Eats
“Things we lose have a way of coming back to us in the end, if not always in the way we expect.” Luna Lovegood must be referring to the new Heritage Eats stationed in what was the legendary Thai Café’s home in the basement of building 420. With its savvy ordering system and plethora of eclectic offerings, Luna would undoubtedly enjoy herself here.
Dobby: Lathrop Cupboard Café
Given Hobby’s peculiar appearances, he would likely inhabit Lathrop in his spare time, tucked away in the crevices of the building that is Cupboard Café. With offerings such as the Miso Pesto Ramen, Dobby would feel at home among the students that camp out in the 24-hour room just above. “Dobby has heard of your greatness, *Lathrop.”
College students and amateur wizards alike, we all need food. And there is no doubt a place where every major Harry Potter character would eat on Stanford’s campus. The food chooses the student, just as the wand chooses the wizard.