It’s been another rocky run around the sun, but lucky for us the holidays are here to lighten the load. I love coffee and I want to know which holiday drink at Starbucks gives me the most joy. So I went to the coffee chain and taste-tested 8 of its holiday drinks so that you don’t have to. I ranked all of the drinks on a scale of 1-10; 1 being “I feel exactly the same, if not worse” and 10 being “Call me Grandma because I just got run over by a reindeer.”
1. Peppermint Mocha
Ahh the big kahuna of holiday drinks. Peppermint mocha is a staple this time of year. It’s the perfect blend of chocolate, coffee, and peppermint. It isn’t the holidays if I don’t drink one. I give this a perfect 10.
Rating: 10/10
2. Chestnut Praline Latte
“Chestnuts roasting on an open fire, lattes chillin’ in a scarf.”
I’m apprehensive about this one because there’re not one, but two nuts in the name of the drink. The chestnut praline tastes like a liquefied sugar nut but I still enjoy it. Did I feel like belting “The Christmas Song” the whole time? A little.
Rating: 6/10
3. Caramel Brulee Frappuccino
Sugar, sugar, and more sugar. If we break down the name it’s just burned sugar. This drink tastes remarkably similar to the regular caramel Frappuccino. I’m (obviously) turned off by the sugar rush and potential diabetes *shrug* I might endure after drinking this. Maybe the latte version is better.
Rating: 4/10
4. Eggnog Latte
I have to admit — I have a genuine hate for eggnog. Turning it into a latte should be against the law. On the other hand, eggnog is traditionally supposed to put you in the holiday spirit. But in my book, I still don’t like the taste.
Rating: 3/10
5. Gingerbread Latte
The great thing about Starbucks drinks is that they’re versatile (aka, you can get them hot or cold). I order the latte version because its 30 degrees where I am. It tastes like a liquid cinnamon challenge. Nonetheless, it does remind me of an extravagant gingerbread house. Oh, the holidays.
Rating: 7/10
6. Peppermint Hot Chocolate
If you haven’t had hot chocolate on a cold winter night, you’re missing out. The hot chocolate at Starbucks hits the spot, and adding peppermint to it makes it even better. It loses its minty-ness towards the bottom of the cup, but it’s still satisfying.
Rating: 9/10
7. Starbucks Holiday Blend Coffee
Coffee is the head drink-in-charge at Starbucks. Every year, the chain debuts a holiday blend of its coffee. Most people can’t tell the difference between roasts, let alone blends. I am most people. So I call this one festive by name association.
Rating: 5/10
8. Fruitcake Frappuccino
The Starbucks gods must be running out of ideas because they took the world’s most widely hated dessert and turned it into a Fruitcake Frappuccino. It’s holiday nonsense, but the taste leaves something to be desired.
Rating: 6.5/10
No matter which drink you have in your hand, the holidays are still a time of joy and celebration. Spend it with the ones you love at Starbucks.