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Lifestyle

7 Times Every Basic Bitch Will Use the New Avocado Emoji

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at Queen's U chapter.

If you haven’t heard already, 38 new emojis could be unleashed upon smartphone users next June, allowing youths everywhere to ditch the alphabet in favour of communicating via tiny pictures.

Among the proposed emojis are popular food items like bacon strips, a croissant, a cucumber, and an avocado. The avocado in particular is deserving of a new emoji considering that the avocado was the superfood of 2013, becoming a staple in every Whole Foods store and health freak’s Instafeed.

The new avocado emoji has so many purposes outside of pretending that you actually enjoy eating salad for lunch. Here are 7 basic ways to welcome the avocado emoji into your heart and your iPhone screen:

1. When you whip up a gorgeous smoothie bowl.

 

As of yet, there are no emojis for chia seeds, coconut flakes, or flax seed meal (get it together emoji gods), so for now, we’ll just have to make do with what we have: avocados.

2. When kale is the main ingredient in your dish.

avocado emoji

Photo courtesy of Flickr.com

Because #lezbehonest, if you’re going to be eating kale or avocado, they’re going to be together. And if you don’t post about your food on instagram, did your kale meal really happen?

3. Anytime you hashtag #yoga.

avocado emoji

Photo courtesy of  Flickr.com

Avocados are practically the symbol for releasing your chakra and having a balanced chi. Probably.

4. When you need an emergency bottomless brunch.

avocado emoji

Photo by Suzanne Joyella

You need a quick way to assemble all of your gals on a hungover Sunday morning, and the avocado emoji is your 911 call for mimosas and goat cheese frittatas. And what’s brunch without a little avocado toast?

5. When you literally can’t make up your mind on which scented candle to buy.

avocado emoji

Photo by Sunny Tang

Peach bellini? Vanilla bean embrace? Which scent will complement your Lauren Conrad books and polaroids strung up on clothespins? With the help of the trusty new emoji rating system, your loved ones can share their opinions on the most difficult of decisions. Toasted marshmallow delight: 3/5 avocados.

6. When you hang up twinkling lights above your bed.

avocado emoji

Photo courtesy of  Flickr.com

You just spent half an hour standing on a chair, trying to tape lights to the wall and ceiling like you’re in a Taylor Swift music video. Let your basic friends acknowledge your backbreaking efforts with an ode to the creamy, shelled pear. And just as pears struggle to be avocados, you struggle to be a DIY Pinterest girl.

7. Anytime you gush over your love for Nutella while eating straight from the jar.

avocado emoji

Photo courtesy of Flickr.com

Everyone knows that avocados and love are the same. Instead of saying that we love this chocolate, hazelnut spread, we should be broadcasting that we *avocado emoji* Nutella even though Nutella’s not part of the paleo diet.

Once released, the avocado emoji will come to embody everything we love (from Michael Kors to the avocado margarita). Basic girls everywhere can rejoice knowing that their voices are being heard, and that their cries for small cartoon images are not being ignored. Only when the Starbucks line of emojis is announced will we know that we have truly triumphed.

Samantha Fung

Queen's U '16