Whether it’s because we’re pretending to be healthy for a day (ha-ha) or we have a million classes in a row and simply just don’t have time to grab something to eat, we’ve all experienced HANGER. Yes, I’m talking about the wombo (word combo) for hunger and anger. I’m not one who often experiences this hanger because I live my life meal to meal, but when I do word to the wise: steer clear! Here are the 9 stages of hanger as told by Orange Is the New Black. Why? Because who doesn’t absolutely love that show.
1. You convince yourself that you can do it
You’re walking out the door with a little pep in your step and you’re all like, YA I GOT THIS!
2. But soon you’re stomach is making all kinds of weird sounds
@Stomach stop talking please, people are looking.
3. And you’re questioning why you ever did this to yourself
We all make mistakes…
4. Then all sorts of crazy hits
Your left eye is twitching slightly uncontrollably and maybe you’re laughing a little too much at a not-so-funny joke.
5. All you can talk about or think about is food
One time… five hours ago… I had barbecue wings. Ugh, those were the days
6. The hallucinations have hit
God, is that you? Pizza, is that you? HA-HA no. Because you’re in philosophy class for another hour.
7. You snap out of your crazy and remember it will all be over soon
I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!
8. Nope, that’s short-lived, and the full-on rage sets in
ALL HELL HAS BROKEN LOOSE.
9. But finally your prayers are answered and you get to eat
Pure satisfaction.
Here’s a little friendly advice to all my fellow food lovers and Spooners out there: DON’T do this to yourself.