Dining Halls must be the perfect place for the weirdest meals. Take the cultural mixing bowl of college and dump it into an endless buffet of breakfast food, burgers, salads, Mexican, Asian, pasta, and more and you’ve got a recipe for weird. Spend some time dining hall people watching, and I guarantee you’ll see most of these unique meals.
Forks over Hands
Even if your hands get greasy, or if you’ve never eaten a grilled cheese before, there is still no excuse for eating a grilled cheese with a fork. And by fork, I mean a fork and only a fork. No knives here. I’m not entirely sure what the thought process was, but skewering a sandwich with a fork before bringing it to your mouth just seems cruel and fairly impractical.
I am the Egg Man
There’s more than one egg man. I’ve seen several versions of him. There’s low-key Egg Man, who will have a few leaves of spinach on his plate along with his four eggs. And then, of course, there’s Extreme Egg Man, who will not succumb to the constraints of society and make sure to get 300% of his daily protein from the 12 eggs in front of him.
Keep Your Distance
I’m always a little cautious when I see Bean Guy. Just like Egg Man, Bean Guy wants to get swole at all costs, even if it means putting his digestive system into fiber-overload mode. Sometimes Bean Guy will add a layer of brown rice beneath his mountain of beans, but salsa or any vegetable is forbidden. I’d be interested to see if Bean Guy ever transforms into Egg Man for a day, but somehow it seems rude to ask.
Spud
The potato is such a wonderful, versatile food. You can have it baked or fried in so many different ways! Waffle fries, regular fries, tater tots– and the possibilities double if you add sweet potatoes (I wouldn’t recommend it though, it ruins your monochrome color scheme). Add cheese or ketchup if you must.
Lettuce Eat
This one is my favorite. I was eating one day, and a guy sat down at the table next to mine with a plate of spinach. Just full of plain spinach. He definitely gave off a hippie kind of vibe– tie dye headband, long hair, the whole deal. This wasn’t the weirdest part, though. After a few minutes, Mr. Spinach stands up and leaves without eating a single leaf. Excuse me, sir, but if you’re going to confuse me with a plate full of plain spinach, at least eat some of it.
College is great. College is made up of an enormous variety of people with different tastes and cultures, especially when it comes to food. Keep your eyes open next time you go to a dining hall, and you might spot some interesting concoctions on the plates around you. Keep an open mind, try not to judge too harshly, and you might discover your new favorite meal. (Unless you see someone put marshmallows in their ice cream. That’s just wrong.)