My dream is to be Spoon University NYU’s “National Burger Critic.” My first action will be to ask Thrillist’s National Burger Critic, Kevin Alexander, to teach me his ways. Mr. Alexander recently published The 100 Best Burgers in America, and, as expected, many of the restaurants featured are in New York. In fact, more New York restaurants populate the list than any other state, including California. (If you’re looking for The Best Burgers in Brooklyn, check that out here.)
Scrolling through all 100 rankings is daunting, so my burger-obsessed self sifted through and pulled all of the New York City locations, so you can get your red meat fix. Vegans beware.
#79: Red Hook Lobster Pound: Hook Burger
“[A] member of the Brooklyn dry-age mafia, this burger has short rib, chuck, and brisket, and is a relatively thick patty with a formidable loose grind, and enough funk to make you run your tongue over your teeth.”
#77: JG Melon: Cheeseburger
I’ve had this burger and I am so happy it’s included on the list. JG Melon’s burger is just your classic cheeseburger in “a classic New York restaurant teeming with watermelon pictures and statues.”
#69: Rose’s: Hamburger with Gruyère
Mr. Alexander says this burger is the “best backyard burger you could ever make,” because of its wood-fired grill taste, Gruyere cheese, and mayo.
#62: Bar Sardine: Fedora Burger
The Fedora Burger has crispy potato strings on it. Do I need to write anything else?
#60: Ruby’s Cafe: Classic Cheeseburger
Look at that double stack, that double cheese, those fries and that bun…this is what a classic cheeseburger should look like. I can almost taste it through the screen.
#50: Wilma Jean: Single Burger with American
If you have to add something to this burger, it needs “nothing else” other than some hearty pickles and onions. And as someone who grew up telling her father to load her burgers with extra pickles, I can vouch for that.
#41: The Happiest Hour: The Happiest Burger
Two patties molded as one by melty cheese. Heart eyes and happy dances everywhere. Get there as soon as they open, or else you’ll have to wait to get your hands on one of these.
#39: Emmy Squared: Le Big Matt
I have yet to try this burger, but I think my friends talk about this burger more than any other in NYC. Hell, I talk about this burger all the time and I haven’t even had it yet! Look at that aioli, the pickles, the cheese………oh my god.
#34: Boilermaker: Single Burger with American
This burger, while it looks like your classic single patty burger, has a secret blend of spices that make it so unique.
#25: Grindhaus: Haus Burger
I’m just going to quote Mr. Alexander directly on this one: “When I bit into the burger, I think I actually started crying a little bit. Both of the patties were perfectly cooked, with a Maillard reaction so intense you could see the elements of crispy beef flaking off the ends. The cheese, house-made pickles, and special sauce all teamed up to attack my taste buds Captain Planet-style, melding together in beefy, salty, (porky, maybe?), creamy glory with just enough acid to keep balance.”
#12: The Brindle Room: Sebastian’s Steakhouse Burger
This burger is the favorite amongst all of the Thrillist Editorial staff. A unanimous opinion nowadays speaks volumes. The burger is “peppery” and the caramelized onions give it a “nearly soup-rich flavor.”
#2: Raoul’s: The Burger
This is the number 2 burger IN THE COUNTRY. But here’s a tip: Raoul’s only makes 12 BURGERS A NIGHT. So that means you’re gonna want to get to their joint before the kitchen opens to get your order in ASAP.
My second action will be to eat at all of these places by the end of this year. I’ve already been to J.G. Melon, and can say it’s one of my favorite burger joints. Anyone willing to take the challenge with me?