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Lifestyle

7 Foods All Messy Eaters Should Avoid

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at Miami (OH) chapter.

Sometimes, eating can get a little messy. We’re all grown now, and we’ve been told countless times to eat with our mouths closed and to use proper silverware, but some foods make that pretty hard.

These seven foods bring out people’s worst manners — or maybe they’re simply just too sloppy to eat. Next time you snag one of these delicious meals, try to keep it classy.

Spaghetti

messy

Photo by Maggie Gorman

Even if you’re not Lady and the Tramp-ing it, this Italian dish can get real messy, real quick. Slurping up long, thin noodles leads to them slapping on your chin (it happens to the best of us when super hungry). This leaves a semi-permanent orange stain from simple spaghetti sauce around the mouth — not cute.

Chili

messy

Photo courtesy of Josué Goge on flickr.com

Not only does this chili look like brown mush topped with fluorescent plastic cheese, but someone always ends up with some infamous chili outside of their mouth.

Skyline Chili can top many different things, from hot dogs, fries to spaghetti. But the chili is so messy that it usually just engulfs whatever food it’s paired with. Always judging hard on late night chili eaters.

Burritos

messy

Photo by Julie Mirliss

Ahh, the burrito. Is there a correct way to eat one? If you bite into the corner, all the good stuff is bound to fall out eventually. Even the burrito bowl isn’t immune to sloppiness.

Too many people, myself included, get hyped up with excitement and hunger after a long Chipotle line and start attacking their food with a fork as if our mothers never taught us how to chew and swallow. Burritos are delicious, but definitely not date night dinner material.

Ribs

messy

Photo by Rafi Letzter

While there are many varieties of ribs, from dry rub to baby back slathered in sauce, the person consuming them is destined to look like they are trying to tear apart a Christmas present with their own teeth.

And to the people that try to approach ribs with a knife and fork, I’m here to tell you that you are really missing out. Yes, eating ribs can be hands-on, and quite sloppy, but you really need to eat off the bone to get the authentic taste of your grub. Just make sure to have plenty of napkins handy.

Chicken Wings

messy

Photo by Hannah Burks

Going to Buffalo Wild Wings, with 4 different sizes and 21 different sauces, means chicken wings are bound to get messy. The issue with chicken wings is that there are sometimes multiple bones inside the wing, and why wouldn’t you want to eat every bit of meat possible?

This ends up making you look a little like a ravenous pack of dogs when you’re chowing down on your large platter of wings with your bros. Try boneless wings next time.

Sloppy Joes

messy

Photo courtesy of usda.gov

I mean, come on, “sloppy” is in the name. There is no way to eat one of these sandwiches in a civilized manner. If you’re going to eat a Sloppy Joe, you might as well forget about the haters. Or, you can just do it in the privacy of your own home, pick up the sandwich, and let it all hang out.

Ketchup-Slathered Anything

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Photo by Natalie Choy

“Let’s split fries” is the epitome of any girl’s late night conversation. All is swell until your so-called-bestie reaches for the ketchup bottle just as the fries are put down on the table, squirting ketchup all over the communal fries. Not only has this changed your perspective on this “bestie,” but now you both have ketchup fingers.

Meghan Flynn

Miami (OH) '18