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Lifestyle

7 Times the Grumpy Cat Accurately Described How I Feel About Dieting

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at Manhattan chapter.

Everyone wants a bikini body for the summer, I mean, aren’t we all looking forward to those beach day Instagrams? But one thing I can’t stand more then your selfie filled Instagram dash, is nonstop talking about dieting.

We all have that one friend who won’t shut up about their diet. Sure juice cleanses sound like the bomb because they’re trendy and all, but I would rather hear nails on chalkboard than a rant about cleansing your digestive tract. I mean, I’m glad you are trying to be healthy and all, but keep your calorie counting away from me.

Grumpy cat, or Tard, is one of the most cynical animals on the Internet, and he has all the answers you need when your friend won’t shut her lettuce filled mouth about dieting.

Here are the seven most annoying things people on diets say, and the appropriate grumpy cat response.

1. When you offer them the last slice of pizza: “I can’t eat that, I just worked out.”

grumpy cat

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You know you just denied pizza right? PIZZA.

2. As you are funneling your 40 oz in your dorm room’s bathtub: “I can’t drink this weekend, I’m on a no carb diet.”

grumpy cat

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Carbs are important and so is beer. Just go away you’re annoying me.

3. When you order everything on the dollar menu: “Oh, I’ll just have a salad.”

grumpy cat

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Ok but did you know you can get drunk at McDonald’s abroad? Try doing that on a diet, you can’t.

4. When you ask for a ride to Chipotle“I don’t eat Chipotle anymore.”

grumpy cat

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You’re literally killing my vibe.

5. When it’s finally nice out and you’re tanning on the quad: “Do you want to go for a run today?”

grumpy cat

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Let me live my life.

6. When you’re eating your BK chicken fries, sipping on your non-diet Coca Cola: “I’m only drinking cayenne pepper water with lemon for ten days.”

grumpy cat

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Sounds awful.

7. When for the hundredth time they say, “I’m on a diet.”

grumpy cat

Photo courtesy of ibreatheimhungry.com

So if you’re one of those people, good for you on your healthy adventures but no one cares.

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Grumpy Cat Diet

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Catherine Kinney

Manhattan '12