2 Chainz has a better life than you. After hitting mainstream success with classics like “Birthday Song” and “I’m Different,” he has been flaunting wealth right in your face as you jam to it in your ’98 Nissan Altama. While everyone knows how much he loves high-class escorts and money, what you probably don’t know is that he has a deep love for food, as well.
2 Chainz, author of the cookbook #MEALTIME, has referenced food constantly in his lyrics, with such gems like “Big ass, long hair, thick thighs / Eat lobster tail like french fries” and “Scrr..Scrr.. wrists moving, cooking, getting to it / I’m in the kitchen, yams everywhere.” In terms of rapping, food is 2 Chainz’ Hennessy.
GQ’s “Most Expensivest Shit” series features 2 Chainz doing the most absurd and wild things that money can buy. Here are some of the priciest foods the rapper has chowed down on.
$295.00 burger
This reasonably priced bite comes from renowned chef Joe Calderone. It’s called “Le Burger Extravagent” and is served at Serendipity 3 in NYC.
The best ingredient hands down is the cheese that is aged in a cave for 18 months. Yep, a cave. The burger doesn’t include fries, but if it did it would probably come from the last remaining potatoes of the Great Irish Famine to match its pedigree.
All jokes aside, it does look dank and all the proceeds go to Valley Mission, which is a program that feeds the local homeless. So now yo smug ass can feel good about itself while you wipe off your face with a gold/diamond/sapphire-encrusted napkin.
Gold-Plated Billion Dollar Popcorn
Move over butter, because gold is the new “it” flavor. The 23-karat gold flaked snack comes from Berco’s Popcorn, which according to their owner is “world famous” and sells the most premium popcorn around. After some fact-checking done by my people, we have determined that it is 100% not world famous, but is expensive as hell, with a can of around 100 kernels costing about $500.00. So it’s pretty on par with the cost of a large popcorn and drink at your local movie theatre.
The salt is also extravagant and is imported from an island off the coast of Denmark called Læsø. It is noted in the video that the owner advises people only 13 and up to eat this, because who knows? Gold holds no nutritional value or carbs, so if you’re trying to shed a few pounds, I would suggest starting on the Gold-Ova-Everythang diet.
$600.00 Coffee
It’s made from cat poop. Also, the “Cat Shit” coffee apparently doesn’t taste any different than regular coffee. However, I still highly recommend scooping your cat’s feces from the litter box and brewing it so you get extra boost in the morning.
The best part of this video is 2 Chainz making this guy believe for a whole five minutes that they’re actually friends. “You know what a zip is?” “Yeah…sort of.”
$100K Bottled Water
“Whats the difference in water? I mean, ain’t it all the same? You drink it, you piss it, you flush it.” Truer words have never been spoken by 2 Chainz as he questioned the water enthusiast on why the different grade even matters.
The main takeaway is the process in which water is judged: the TDS (Total Dissolved Solids). This method that someone actually cared enough to make up is the fool-proof way to rate someone’s water. He then presents some fine selections such as 15,000 year old glacier water, which musician/drink aficionado, Diplo, confirms is “definitely water.”
The main beaut however is the Beverly Hills 9OH2O, which is around $100,000 a pop, includes another bottle and four glasses. It has an earth-shattering 600 TDS and comes with a 14-karat diamond top. Flashy!
$1K Ice Cream Sundae
This time 2 Chainz is “really going to blow your fucking brains out” with another stupid meal. “The Golden Opulent Sundae” comes from our OG homeboy Joe Calderon. Once again, it holds a Guinness World Record, ensuring this guy can sleep at night.
The sundae comes in a $300 Baccarat Harcourt crystal goblet, the same one the Vatican uses. In short, Calderon is saying his sundae is just as important as the Church’s Holy Communion.
The ingredients, which you can find most of in your pantry, includes the finest Tahitian vanilla ice cream infused with Madagascar vanilla, chunks of rare Venezuelan Chuao chocolate, candied fruit from Paris, and the most expensive caviar. The cherry on top is a gold-encrusted sugar flower, because fuck it, why not?
If your dish is ever lacking some pizzazz just throw some gold on it. Calderone states that gold actually has no taste whatsoever, but there’s “nothing cooler than eating gold.” The actual ice cream is maybe $5, but everything else is around $995.00.
This guy basically throws expensive shit on an ordinary dish and calls himself a chef. He’s the Dan Bilzerian of cooking. Despite the extravagance, some critics are unimpressed. YouTube user Eric Freeman gave a scathing review in the comments section of the video, stating “I tried this and honestly a normal $10.00 sundae is better for me.” I’ll stick to the Ben & Jerry’s high-grade Cheese Cake Brownie ice cream.