Being single on Valentine’s Day means there’s no pressure to plan the perfect date, no tacky gifts to give or pretend to like, and no significant other to inevitably disappoint. But that doesn’t mean you’re invincible to the Valentine-blues. Loneliness can affect your mental and physical health. So swap out the aphrodisiacs this year and try some nausea-easing alternatives.
1. Pepto Bismol
Pepto Bismol is a classic minty holiday treat. It’s a staple around Valentine’s Day, that’s why it’s pink. Listen to your body and pour as much Pepto as you think you’ll need into a festive mug. Cozy up on the couch with your Bis and pop on a movie to fit the the mood, like the first five minutes of Up on a loop.
2. Saltines Softened with Tears
Saltines are my go-to when I’m feeling queasy. Beware, if you eat too many at once your mouth will dry out, leaving you more frustrated and upset than you were in the first place.
Take it slow. Start with one or two crackers and work your way up to more. If the dryness is too much for you, use the jar of your collected tears in your bedside drawer (admit it, we all have one) to soak the saltines. This not only softens the crackers, but adds an earthy flavor.
3. Unsweetened Applesauce
I subscribe to the apple-a-day ideology, but when I’m lonely, I find biting, chewing, and digesting a whole apple can be strenuous. Make sure it’s unsweetened, added sugar often contributes to nausea, so keep it simple.
4. Concord Grapes
Concord grapes fall into a niche category of foods that I call “activity foods”. This refers to the EPB (effort per bite) a food requires. Concord grapes have a relatively high EPB, which serves as a great distraction from reality.
Focus intently on sucking each grape out of it’s tough skin and separating the seeds from the flesh. By the time your bowl is finished, Valentine’s Day will be over and you can drift off to sleep as your stomach ferments the grapes sloshing around inside of you.
5. La Croix Bubbles
Only the actual bubbles from a can of La Croix are necessary for your purposes. Go outside with a heavily shaken can, pop it open and inhale the carbonation. Repeat with a new can each time until satisfied.