There’s nothing worse than finding out your favorite drink has been cut from the A-team. Although Starbucks will always be very near and dear to my heart (and to surviving college), it seems like some of the MVPs have been lost due to a few marketing flops (looking at you, Orange Valencia, I miss you).
I’ve compiled a list of eight Starbucks failures that can’t even be found on Starb’s extensive secret menu, so they must really be goners.
1. Chantico Drink
Hold up, Hold up. Did I just read that right? Starbucks once had a LIQUIFIED CHOCOLATE on their menu? Why on earth this was ever a marketing flop baffles me. This 6 oz drink boasted a hefty 390 calories and 20 grams of fat in that tiny cup. Despite this chocolatey drink being heavily marketed, it was dropped from the menu shortly after—sigh.
2. Mazagran Coffee Soda
Ah, two things very near and dear to my heart: coffee and soda. However, I am a little skeptical about mixing the two together. I must have not been the only one with this mindset as this Mazagran, coffee-soda drink, entered and left the market in 1994 faster than I could get my hands on it (and before I was even born).
3. Sorbetto
Marketed during the summer, much like last summer’s Granita drinks (yum), this icy, sweet sorbet-based drink came in two flavors: Tropical Tangy Creme and Berry Pink Citrus. As tasty as it sounds, this cool drink never made it past regional testing on the West coast (a big L for those of us on the other side).
4. Maple Macchiato
I’m a big fan of Starbucks Caramel Macchiato; it’s the perfect drink to cuddle up to in the winter or cool down to in the summer. Knowing this, I must say, I’m pretty bummed I never got to try this drink while it was on USA grounds. However, some people are hopping the boarder over to Canada to get their hands on this drink, so maybe that’s my next move.
5. Cherries Jubilee Mocha
I love a good scoop of Cherry Garcia or Cherries Jubilee ice cream, and I love coffee, so this one had to be amazing, right? The Cherries Jubilee Mocha was released during the holidays alongside the Chestnut Praline Latte, however, never made it past testing in Southern states. Maybe it had something to do with the cherry syrup reminding us to closely of those treaded childhood cough syrups.
6. Valencia Orange Refresher
Here we begin the most recent of fatalities, the loss of the beloved Valencia orange drink (ugh). It seems like just yesterday this drink was my summer go-to. However, for unknown reasons, Starbucks decided the pull the plug on this one. People all over were enraged to find out their favorite drink would soon be gone. Petitions were signed and blogs blew up, however, no one was able to resurrect this great drink.
7. Dark Barrel Latte
In 2014, Starbucks released a new beer-flavored coffee alongside their seasonal Pumpkin Spiced Latte. Although nonalcoholic, the drink had a chocolate-stout flavored sauce and was said to have tasted a lot like beer. However, people on Twitter were claiming that it tasted “like drinking a Guinness in the early morning… So yuck.” Sounds like it was a good thing this one never made it past testing phase.
8. Island-Inspired Frappes
Take a trip to the Isles with Starbucks Maui, Copacabana, and South Beach-layered Frappuccinos. These eye-pleasing drinks were layered with real fruit, mousse, and a coconut-syrup frappe blend—HOLY YUM. Sadly this drink started and ended in the summer of 2014 and only those lucky enough to be in the San Diego area got a taste of it.
There you have it, eight Starbucks drinks that didn’t meet the demands of coffee-loving America. Although I wasn’t one of the lucky few to taste many of these regionally-tested drinks, I’m hopeful that one day, these drinks will pop back up on one of Starbucks many secret menu sites. Fingers crossed America.