Your server stands next to your table, attentively jotting down your order and proceeds to ask “what kind of dressing did you want on that salad?”
I’m sure you think the correct response is “well, what are my options?” But, you’re wrong. This is not a question you need to be asking. There is only one option. Forget balsamic, raspberry vinaigrette, Italian and thousand island. You’re getting ranch dressing because it is sure to gets your taste buds as excited as a little kid who just got his hands on some Pop Rocks (who am I kidding, we all still jump at any opportunity to indulge in them).
But, I have one troubling question for all you ranch lovers out there: why are chicken wings and fresh celery being served with a side of… blue cheese? Does anyone actually like blue cheese? Does blue cheese make anything taste better? Every time I’ve been out with friends and someone orders wings, we’ve always had to bother our server with a special request, “Can I have ranch instead?”
There’s something about the smooth, milky texture of ranch that makes it work on such a wide variety of meals, not just salads. The combination of buttermilk, herbs and spices that comprises a bottle of ranch makes this dressing incredibly versatile and handy for that extra kick. It is even possible to create a lower fat, homemade version of ranch with sour cream or yogurt, only extending ranch’s uses to accommodate those who pay close attention to what they’re eating. Whichever way you want your ranch, it’s time you tried it with some of your other favorite foods.
Here’s my top five:
1. Pizza
Photo by @chicken4god
My mouth is watering just thinking about this cosmic swirl of ranch paired with Mellow Mushroom’s Buffalo Chicken pizza. It definitely woke up like this—flawless.
2. Chicken Tenders
Photo by Nicole Goldfarb courtesy of Hickory Tavern
Is this a cop-out from the wings bit earlier? I think not. Who doesn’t love a little breaded and fried chicken strip with side of ranch?
3. Fish Tacos
Photo by Nicole Goldfarb courtesy of Hickory Tavern
Yes, you could be sophisticated and get the cosmopolitan mango salsa, but why do that when you can slather it up with some home-style ranch dressing instead?
4. Chips
Photo by Nicole Goldfarb courtesy of Hickory Tavern
Actually now that I think about it, I could really go for a ramekin of ranch and a tray of Kettle Cooked chips.
5. Curly Fries
Photo by @ahkiaw327
Throw out the ketchup and make room for dressing!
There’s a bottle of ranch dressing waiting behind your closed refrigerator door, and it’s calling your name. It’s time to break it out and chow down. #RANCHISLIFE