Some people like to eat off of their significant others in bed. But some foods can be dangerous, like hot foods. Other foods are just plain gross. Find out which foods should stay out of the bedroom and in the kitchen.
1. Cheese Fondue
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Cheese fondue is one of those foods that you can put on almost anything and it would make it a billion times better. Your body, however, is not one of them. Cheese retains heat and does not cool very quickly (which you know if you’ve ever burned your mouth on pizza). Leave the fondue on bread and skip this one.
2. Soup
Photo by Judy Holtz
Most soups contain a lot of water. Water has a high heat capacity which means it’s slow to cool. Not only will this lead to burns but soup is unbelievably messy because it is not very thick. Just don’t do it.
3. Peanut Butter
Photo by Katherine Carroll
People with peanut allergies can experience rashes on their skin or anaphylaxis (a potentially life-threatening reaction) if the food is consumed. An adverse reaction to an allergen can be highly embarrassing and there is nothing hot about anaphylactic shock. Try ice cream instead.
4. Sticky Foods
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In theory really sticky foods like syrup and melty marshmallow sound like a good idea. But sticky foods can get stuck on the little hairs on your body. And nobody wants an impromptu wax. Keep syrup on your pancakes, just to be safe.
5. Sauces
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Sauces like tomato sauce generally get dangerously hot and take a long time to cool (again, if you’ve ever burned your mouth with pizza). In the time that it takes the sauce to cool you could get seriously burned. Ouch. Piping hot sauces are best put to use on pasta.
6. Lunchmeat
Photo by Agnes Chen
In the words of my friend, “that’s just not sexy.” And I have to agree because:
1. Lunch meat smells when it’s not kept cold
2. No one has ever sexily eaten it
3. It’s kinda slimy
7. Melted Candy
Photo by Peter Pearson
Candy has a lot of sugar in it and sugar is another food with a high heat capacity. So it is slow to heat and slow to cool, which is not good for your skin. Things like gummy bears will turn to molten lava when melted and put onto the skin. However if you must eat things like melted chocolate off of your partner be sure to test the heat on the back of your hand or inner wrist.
No one wants all of the couples of the world to have fun on Valentine’s Day more than I do. But some foods are too gross or dangerous to be used in bed. Just do yourselves a favor and avoid the melted gummy bears.