I was pleasantly surprised when I heard that former Crimson Tide quarterback AJ McCarron was planning to open up a sushi restaurant in Tuscaloosa. The restaurant is currently under construction at 1914 University Blvd. and the projected opening date is June 1. 

I felt hopeful, excited and interested to try it out and I appreciated that he was showing good ol' T-Town some love. But after I heard more about what the restaurant will be like and what will be on the menu, I realized that I would like him to take that love and put it in a box. Then I would like him to put that box inside another box and store it away forever. I have a lot of love for AJ, but I'm not feeling this new sushi joint one bit. Here's why.

The Name

"Ajian." Seriously, pick any other name. I'm begging you. "AJ" is obviously AJ McCarron's first name. I get that, you get that, we all get that. Apparently AJ and his business partner Pete Zimmer were so hell-bent on exploiting AJ's name in the college town that made him famous that they didn't mind being a little derogatory along the way when it came to naming the restaurant. This is a sushi bar, called Ajian. Asian. Ajian. Asian. Sushi is technically from Asia, yes, but to refer to sushi as "Asian" is incorrect. Sushi is specifically from Japan. Do not take a food that originates from one country and then generalize an entire continent for it. Russia is part of both Europe and Asia, however when I think of Russia I do not think of Sushi. Catch my drift? 

The Sign is Ridiculous 

Again, with the exploitation of AJ's name in a derogatory fashion. I saw this sign and thought: "you're kidding me." They made these fake characters look like "AJ." I didn't actually believe that these people wrote the letters "AJ" sideways to make it look like an unspecified form of an Asian country's scripture. Different countries have different characters that mean the same thing, for example, Chinese scripture and Japanese scripture have different characters for the same word in their own respective languages.

The "Casual and Fast-Paced Atmosphere" Sounds Stressful AF

This is a build-your-own sushi bar, so prepare for some major anxiety. “At the hit of a button we’ll have white or brown rice, and from there you’ll pick your proteins, vegetables, toppings and sauces for close to $8 a roll,” Pete Zimmer said in a report by the Crimson White. To me, this sounds like I'm going to walk in there hangry, not be able to decide what I want and feel pressured to just leave. 

The Rolls are Too Trendy 

Ergo, they sound nasty. I understand that being into Hot Cheetos is trendy right now and anything with Nutella is always an eye catcher, but a Hot Cheetos or Nutella sushi roll sounds extremely unappetizing. Nutella rocks on things like waffles or crepes, but sushi needs to stay in its lane. There is also a peanut butter and jelly roll. Again, stay in your lane. 

Dessert Rolls? 

Excuse me, but I didn't think I would have time to stick around for dessert since this entire restaurant experience sounds as hurried as a game of touch football (shoutout to my boy AJ). In case you managed to overstay your welcome though, you can try a dessert roll made of fruit roll-ups, rice krispy treats and licorice. Yuck.

We Do Not Need Another Sushi Place Here

I really want to know what made anyone think that we were dying for yet another sushi restaurant in Tuscaloosa. Seriously, we're good! We have seven of them already! What we really need is a solid bagel place, then we would be cooking. Literally.

Look, I love Tuscaloosa and I love Alabama football so I wish AJ and Pete all the best here... but my wishes are all I have for them, because they won't be getting my money.