Your Instagram feed is full of mouth-watering, delicious food photos, and as you continue to scroll through your feed, more and more delicious food photos appear. Simply put, it’s #foodporn.
Recently, photographer Bryan Regan found himself without an idea for his shoot. Bryan suddenly had a thought. He grabbed a chicken (I guess that was just laying around?) and tied it down with some gear. He called it “50 Shades of Food,” inspired by the novel 50 Shades of Grey, which he never actually finished.
Bryan soon googled “food bondage,” and he discovered an entire new body of work, which he decided to take to the next level in his photography series. He sees the series as “just a playful piece that I hope people can look at and have a good laugh.” Oh, and enjoy the Spoon nicknames we made up for these very special photos.
“Dildo-nut”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
The donut looks so good that your eyes completely gaze over the neon blue dildo, right?
“Peen-apple”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Another neon dildo but this time strapped onto a pineapple. Very normal. I’m enjoying the color scheme, but I’m not sure if pineapple was the correct fruit. A little prickly, right?
“Raw Spread”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Tie the chicken down so it doesn’t run away. This might be a little extreme, but, hey, it’s just innocent bondage with poultry.
“Mother Nature”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Okay, I hope this one is self-explanatory enough because I do not want to explain it. All I’m going to say is it sucks when it’s her time of the month.
“Pop, Lock & Cock It”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Bananas are incredibly versatile, from banana bread to smoothies. And because they resemble the shape of a penis (kind of), you can also find bananas in sex ed classrooms demonstrating the correct way to put on a condom. And now they can also show you how to use a chastity cock cage (had to google that one).
“Threesome Layer Cake”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
These dildos are completely destroying a perfectly good cake in the name of double penetration. I feel very uncomfortable.
“Just the Tip-tella”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Haha, this one is my favorite because the brown Nutella (plus the dildo) brings one thing to my mind. I have no idea if I will be able to eat Nutella again.
“Pepper-tration”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Okay, I don’t even know what this one is supposed to symbolize, but it reminds me of Christmas – in a dirty type of way.
“Lemon Squeeze”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Nothing like a good old nipple clamp on your citrus fruit.
“Spoon University”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Why do the can of soup and spoon need to be cuffed together? I wish he took this one in a more innocent direction – perhaps the can of soup and spoon could be spooning? No? Fine.
“Anal Hydration”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Is he cleaning off the anal beads? Or does the water symbolize something? Does it symbolize anything? Or did he just dunk the sex toy in a bottle of water for shits and giggles? Explaaaain.
“Crinkle Cuff”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
Ketchup and fries – the ultimate combo. They’ve definitely dunked together more than once…
“Asparagu-swingers”
Photo courtesy of Bryan Regan
The 1970s are back.
Visit Bryan’s website to check out more food porn.