We’ve all been there: You’re at Starbucks, it’s 9:00 am. You’ve scored yourself the best seat in the house, right by the window, and have just cozied up with that perfect cup of joe, ready to launch into full productivity mode. All of a sudden, out of the blue, that venti latte hits you full force, you feel that if you don’t rush off to the bathroom immediately you’re going to burst. What do you do?
After discussing this quasi-doomsday scenario with several experts (read: college students), it’s clear that there are several ways to proceed, depending on who you are, where you are, and whether you’ve already downed enough caffeine to be a semi-functional human being.
Take it with you.
Is 9:12 am too early for human interaction? If that describes you, maybe you just want to bite the bullet, stuff your laptop, papers, and assignment for your next class haphazardly into your bag and schlep it along to the loo. The con? Your spot probably won’t be there when you come back.
Ask the barista.
If you’re chilling at a calm, suburban Starbucks (not one in say, Manhattan), you may have a fighting chance at having a conversation with the barista after you get your coffee. In that case, maybe they’ll drop you a line and keep a birds-eye on your stuff and your seat from their perch.
Ask your neighbor.
If you’re like me, there’s never really a bad time to talk to someone, even if it’s pre-caffeine buzz. Plus, Starbucks can be a nice, not-sketchy way to meet people.So put on your biggest, most charming smile and ask if the lovely lady or gent sitting next to you wouldn’t mind keeping an eye on your stuff, “just for a sec while I run to the restroom?” Odds are they’ll say yes.
#SpoonTip: Maybe they’re cute, and you have an excuse to slide into those DM’s.
Try to hide it.
OK, maybe you can’t find anyone to watch your laptop. But, you’re clever. You can totally pull one over on them…It’s like they won’t even know you’re there.Leave your coffee and a paper or two on the table, but tuck those valuable somewhere sneaky. Maybe under the cushion of that armchair, or wedge it up inside the table. Yeah, you fooled ’em.
#SpoonTip: Usually people wouldn’t care to take your stuff anyway, but if someone really is feeling mischievous, they’ll know where to look.
Just hold it.
If it really comes to this (no one’s around, you have laryngitis and can’t communicate, etc.), just hold it. Keep drinking that coffee like there’s no tomorrow, because having to pee now is the same as having to pee in an hour. Right?
