Snapchat recently updated its “Best Friends” system to an emoji hierarchy that might require a college degree to decipher. Snapchatters are not having it, but the new system prompts a hard-hitting question: what if the emojis described our relationships with food?

 emojiheart Gold Heart – #1 Best Friend: Avocado


Photo by Samantha Thayer

We love avocado and avocado loves us. From breakfast to dessert, he is bae (and basic, but that’s beside the point). He’s delicious, nutritious and trendy – the perfect food to call your #1.

grimace Grimace – You have a mutual #1 Best Friend: Toast


Photo by Shivam Agarwal

Avocado and toast are a go-to pair, so it’s no surprise you share your BFF with this breakfast staple. Toast, however, is kind of clingy, and without avocado (or nut butters, honey and ricotta or greek salad), it has no claim to fame. Those sad selfies he keeps sending, classed up only by a snazzy toaster, never merit a reply. So don’t be too jealous, you’re probably still avocado’s BFF. Probably.

smile emoji Smile – One of your Best Friends: Cookie


Photo by Jessica Kelly

The cookie (or it’s younger sibling, cookie dough) is one of the most versatile, fun desserts. Coming in a myriad of flavors, cookies can be innocent (throwback to the ice cream sandwich, anyone?) or more grown-up (slutty brownies, I’m looking at you). Whatever form it takes, the cookie is definitely a solid food to have has a bestie.

sunglasses Sunglasses – You have a mutual Best Friend: Milk


Photo by Eury Fabian

Milk and cookies, like toast and avocado, simply work together (and they’re probably each other’s BFF). But hey, you won’t sweat it. Cookie is only a best friend, and he’ll never be your #1 (still, just in case, you better stop sending all those snaps of cookie shots and Insomnia trips).

smirk Smirk – You’re their best friend but they’re not yours: Barefoot Wine


Photo by Lauryn Lahr

Cheap wine has one major consumer: college kids, and man, does Barefoot Wine love us. He tends to send lots of “classy” selfies chilling in crystal flutes, and while you aren’t fooled, you cave and reply every once in awhile (because sometimes it’s unavoidable). Still, you’re careful not to get too friendly: you have to avoid the arsenic and maintain that power dynamic.

fire Fire – You two are on a snapstreak for the number of days shown: Ben & Jerry’s Pint


Photo by Becky Hughes

Whichever flavor you are (retired or otherwise), you’ve probably had that flame going for a bit (read: since your last trip to the grocery store). The fire might die out from time to time, but it won’t stay quenched it for long. Ben & Jerry’s is on the edge of ice cream innovation, and while your first streak might be with an old classic, you’ll probably have a few flirtationships with the latest flavors as well.

Snapchat may seek to needlessly complicate our lives, but at least you’ve got your food relationships figured out now. Best of luck with the people ones.

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