Food has always been a source of comfort and community in my life. When I was child, I attended countless potlucks, and to this day, my favorite part about coming home from college is eating family dinner, whether it’s one of my mom’s amazing crockpot meals or my dad’s newest French recipes. But for me, food is also a challenge, because I am autistic. One part of autism that people don’t talk about enough is how sensory issues affect how you respond to certain foods. There have been meals where I love the flavor, but can’t stomach the texture, and it makes going to restaurants and meal planning with my family quite the challenge.
I was 9 years old when I was diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder. The year was 2011, and since I was a fully verbal girl, the options for support were slim. I joke now with my parents that it was essentially my mom’s brief stint working in special education and Temple Grandin’s memoir, The Way I See It, against the world. My parents worked hard to help me where I needed extra support, and I will forever credit their unconditional love and acceptance for why I am able to advocate for myself today as an autistic person, but one area where I still struggle is my sensory issues, especially surrounding food.
I can’t eat steak or roast beef, I can count the number of chicken dishes I’ll eat on one hand, and even if there’s a food where I like the texture and the taste, if I can’t get past the way it looks, chances are I won’t be able to eat it. And while my parents have done their best to accommodate me, no system is perfect, and now that I’m in college and on a meal plan, the lack of dietary options that work with my sensory issues have forced me to get creative.
Every time I go to a restaurant, I look at the menu before making my final decision of where to go. I do this to make sure that there is an option I can eat, and once I find a favorite, I rarely deviate out of fear that I won’t be able to actually eat it. And yet, I have now written several articles for Spoon U that feature me trying new foods on the regular, and not only have I been able to try tons of new foods, but they have all been sensory friendly, from Taco Bell’s summer lineup to local Boston food trucks. The horizons have begun to broaden, and I couldn’t be happier.
I also cook a lot more now, and being able to independently accommodate my sensory issues has been equal parts empowering and delicious, and I even got to share some of my recipes with Spoon U that all met my needs as an autistic person.
Sensory issues with food are one of the many silent battles autistic people fight, and because it’s not seen as externally, it doesn’t get talked about nearly enough for my taste. Not a lot of people understand how I can love the taste of a food item but cannot stand the texture, and to quote my dad, it’s because it tastes good, but it doesn’t feel right. And this Disability Pride Month, I’m looking to start the conversation and let all of you know that if food is a challenge, you’re not alone.