I feel like every time I open Facebook, I see a different article claiming that red wine is good for you, how red wine can replace a trip to the gym, how red wine burns fat, etc. I’m a fake blonde sorority drop-out, so needless to say, I love a nice glass of red wine as much as the next gal.

Plenty of these health claims are valid. For instance, red wine is rich in antioxidants, the darker, the better. Word. Pour me a glass.

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But plenty of these Newsfeed-ready articles leave out essential details that cancel out the proposed health benefits. Here’s a rundown of the most common red wine myths you need to stop believing.

1. A glass of red wine is the equivalent to an hour at the gym

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The Huffington Post tried making this claim, and the research for this article is based on a study that ScienceDaily conducted.

I’m not gonna lie to y’all. When I first saw saw that article, I was jumping for joy. I imagined the rest of my life ahead of me without ever having to exercise again, but instead drinking a glass of wine every night before bed. Shortly after, I realized it seemed to be a little too good to be true.

Another analysis of the ScienceDaily study provided by Men’s Fitness concludes that a glass of red wine is not the equivalent to an hour at the gym. Red wine can burn fat cells, and if you practice drinking red wine in moderation, it can be paired with exercise and aid the weight loss process. But it cannot replace exercise altogether. I haven’t exercised since ‘Nam, so this definitely wouldn’t work for me.

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2. Drinking wine helps you lose weight

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The Journal of Physiology conducted a study with the same intentions as ScienceDaily. This analysis explains that these experiments have been conducted on rats, not humans. You read correctly: I said rats. Yes, like the undesirable rodents that occupy the sewers. No, not like the adorable personified rat in Ratatouille.

According to a post on Skinny Chef, once your liver and your digestive system start to process alcohol, it lowers your blood sugar. So depending on how much wine you drink, it’s gonna make you hungry, and chances are you won’t be hungry for a few celery sticks. You’ll be hungry for ice cream. If you’re drinking a fat-burning beverage but eating foods high in fat content, it’s totally counterproductive.

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3. Red wine is a low-calorie beverage

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Lastly, all kinds of alcohol are abundant in calories. One glass of red wine has 125 calories. That’s more than a spoonful of Nutella, and lets face it, you’re not just going to have one glass.

So, let’s recap:

  1. Are there beneficial antioxidants in red wine?  Yes
  2. Can red wine assist your weight loss process when you pair it with exercising regularly? Yes
  3. Can red wine replace exercising regularly?  No
  4. Depending on the quantity consumed, does red wine make you hungry? Yes
  5. Is red wine high in calories?  Yes

Am I drinking a glass of red wine as I’m editing this post?  Yes

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