I think I peaked this summer when I watched an entire 22 episode season of Scandal in 48 hours. I’m not saying it was a good idea (it was) or that you should try this at home (you should). But I do have a lot of experience when it comes to binge-watching shows. I’ve realized that this often involves snacking, so through tedious research–which mostly involved me sitting in my PJ’s watching TV– I’ve made a definitive list of what you should be binge eating while you binge-watch different shows. Decisions were based on amounts needed, crunchiness vs. chewiness requirements, and what you crave from watching the characters eat. Alcohol needs were added as a result of my emotional attachment and the abuse on part of the writers.
Shonda Rhimes shows
Decisions were based on amounts needed, crunchiness vs. chewiness requirements, and what you crave when watching the characters eat. Alcohol needs were added as a result of my emotional attachment to the characters the writers so gladly bestowed upon me.
Let’s get the hard part out of the way early, as Shonda Rhimes’ shows have proved to be the most addicting binge shows around. The main item you need for Shonda Thursdays is wine. Like liters and liters of it. Honestly, skip the glass and chug from the bottle. These shows require a drink that is cathartic.
Scandal
What would Olivia Pope binge-eat? Wine and popcorn (duh). C’mon people, we’re gladiators in suits. This is not amateur hour.
Grey’s Anatomy
Ice cream, chocolate, wine and tissues. I call this the “too many feelings” sadness combo—which is what I feel every Thursday when Shonda kills EVERYONE off.
How to Get Away With Murder
This calls for wine complimented by any snack you can chew quickly and incessantly. I’d recommend pretzels, if you want salty, Buncha Crunch, if you want sweet, or chocolate-covered pretzels, if you want a mix of both (my personal choice). Also, if you want to channel your inner Annalise Keating, you can drink vodka straight. She still probably needs it more than you do, though.
The Office and/or Parks and Recreation
Pizza, donuts and waffles (a lot of waffles—like a full episode’s worth). These are only some of the snacks you consistently see on these comedies. If you wanna get a little tipsy, have your own office party with some whiskey.
How I Met Your Mother
Beer, sandwiches and “sandwiches” (wink, wink). Some appetizers are also appropriate, like chicken wings, onion rings and—wait for it–burgers. You may not find the best burger in New York City, but let’s just pretend it is.
Orange is the New Black
You need Cup of Noodles and a really crunchy snack (Doritos, Tostitos, Cheetos, etc.) to drown out Piper’s voice.
Game of Thrones
Meat and liquor, as Robert Baratheon would say. Literally, empty out your liquor cabinet. Odds are you’re going to need a buzz to deal with the abusive relationship you’ll develop with this show. Get some wine, rum, tequila and (squire bring more) wine. I’d add some jerky and/or ice cream, so you can eat your feelings as well as drown them (efficiency, people).
Narcos
An urban Spanish dictionary, arroz con pollo and aguardiente.
Dexter
Honestly I wouldn’t eat while I watch this gory show. There are too many bloody limbs (not that that’s a bad thing… it’s just hard to digest). But if you must eat, then donuts or Red Vines are usually a safe (and appropriate) snack. Just please, I’m begging you, don’t eat any of the food from the opening sequence.
American Horror Story
I don’t usually promote eating while there is that much gore on the screen (see Dexter), but this show has way too much musical foreshadowing and suspense that you can’t help but much on something with anticipation. I recommend going for snacks you can eat in giant handfuls: popcorn, M&M’s or maybe your nails, while sipping on some strong alcoholic beverage. Some additional advice: never watch this show alone. I closed my computer after one minute and was afraid to open it for another 48 hours.
Gilmore Girls
Coffee, burgers, Chinese take-out and more coffee. If you’re not ridiculously stuffed and shaking from an immense amount of caffeine by the end of a Gilmore Girls binge, you’re doing it wrong.
Suits
Bagels, sushi and Scotch. If you really wanna get into character, I suggest Macallan Scotch, but fair warning, drinking like Harvey Specter doesn’t come cheap. Also, if you’re wondering how I know what Harvey drinks, it’s because I like to think of myself as Donna.
Breaking Bad
Channel your inner Walter Jr. and eat breakfast food, especially any that is somewhat crunchy and easy to eat a lot of. You’ll need it. I recommend cereal and/or waffles with (obviously blue) M&M’s on top. If you want a meal instead, eat some fried chicken (from Los Pollos Hermanos), some pizza or some science, bitch.
Big Bang Theory
In typical Sheldon Cooper fashion, the meal will depend on the day of the week: Monday is Thai take-out, so have some mee krob and chicken satay with extra peanut sauce. Tuesday is Cheesecake Factory, so have a barbecue bacon cheeseburger with barbecue, bacon and cheese on the side. Thursday is Big Boy night, or pizza night, unless it’s the third of the month, then it’s “anything can happen Thursday.” You get the point: Sheldon has a strict schedule. Follow it and don’t sit in his spot.
Gossip Girl
“Gossip Girl here, your one and only source into the scandalous snacks of Manhattan’s elite.” Sorry, I’ve been dying to say that for a while.
This is the kind of show that you want to eat whatever they are eating (wear whatever they’re wearing, go wherever they’re going, you get my point). This can be difficult because most of us are not actually part of Manhattan’s elite (*curses*). So, let’s try to get as close as we can: Champagne, yogurt (preferably on the MET steps), grapes and some of those Brookside dark chocolate covered goji berries (i.e. a college student’s version of caviar). If you wanna get really fancy, add a cheese platter.
Scrubs
First, make sure you’re watching with a buddy (i.e the Turk to your JD). Grab some cereal and some pancakes, if you happen to have a pancake drawer, and eat it while standing. Doctors don’t have time to sit.
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
As much (Dylan’s Candy Bar) assorted candy as an Indiana Mole Woman who has been trapped in an underground bunker for 12 years can eat. And some Pinot Noir (caviar, Myanmar. Mid-sized car. You don’t have to be popu-lar).
New Girl
Pick a character to channel in your snacking tendencies: Elementary school food (think PB&J sandwiches, string cheese, pudding and candy) for Jess, bagels and lox or matzo ball soup for Schmidt, pizza and beer for Nick, and cat food for Winston.
Friends
Coffee, sushi or a side of unagi, while “gum would be perfection.”
Now you know what to do. Binge away.