I Taste-Tasted the Best Barefoot Wines Because You Can't Go Wrong With Wine

Confession: I might be a functioning alcoholic. In my defense, it's usually just Barefoot, and I've actually gotten better grades on my papers when I wrote them a little wine-tipsy than I usually do sober. So like, popping a bottle most nights is probably okay. Besides, I'm an English major. Alcohol is a staple in my diet, and at least I'm not chugging vodka every day. Only weekends. Usually. 

Admittedly, I first bought Barefoot because it was cheap. I mean, I experimented with Cupcake (ugh) and some awful three dollar wines (double-ugh); but, before Barefoot came along, I thought I just didn't like wine. But then I grabbed one of these babies off the shelf and fell in love. Seriously, their Riesling has me like...

So, in honor of the wines that restored the fermented beverage in my esteem, I've decided to evaluate their flavors. A major criticism of Barefoot regards their wines as being too sweet — as the proud owner of a sweet tooth, I can't say I'll be complaining. Being a broke college student, I couldn't do them all, so I took the top from each category. Here we go. 

Whites

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I generally prefer white wine to red. It's possibly because I douse everything I consume in sugar, so the sweetness of the whites appeals to me more than the sort of sour-bitter dryness of the reds. But hey, to each their own. 

Riesling

As mentioned above, this is usually my go-to wine. It distinctly reminds me of dates with the boy I met in September of my freshman year; not only because we shared it on our first date, but because they both taste the same. (TMI? Maybe.) Sweet, warm, and gentle — it does something to soothe you after a rough week of classes.

Moscato

So, this was the wine responsible for a 2 am drunken walk through the streets of Iowa City to visit the angel statue. It brought together my best friend and I for wine nights and children's movies. Personally, I think it's less sweet than the Riesling, but definitely gentle on your tastes. A go-to for anyone looking for a subtle drunk that doesn't pretend to be anything else.

Chardonnay

Though I don't usually go for this bottle, Chardonnay has this sort of crisp flavor, just like the Fuji Apples it's made from. Sweet and refreshing—not as dry as you would expect—it'll go well with any meal your hosting. It doesn't taste like cheap wine, so you'll look sophisticated in front of your friends. Just don't try to educate anyone on Californian wines. Someone will know better than you, and you'll look awful.

Reds

Now to the other type of wine—the one that comes to mind when most people think of wine. While reds were never my favorite, and I stand hard and true to my bottle of Riesling, I can respect different tastes. 

Merlot

So almost everyone knows of this wine because it's probably used in cooking more often than drinking. It's dry with vague impressions of fruit and not a bad choice if you're going for a casual, not-super-extravagant vibe, and it will definitely save you some cash if you go through bottles quickly. 

Cabernet Sauvignon

This is one of the drier wines Barefoot produces, so I knew I wasn't going to adore it—that being said, there is something about this wine that makes me think it would go wonderfully with dark chocolate. And I would stab someone for dark chocolate, just saying. It smells and tastes like berries, leaving you feeling warm inside — and craving some chocolate.

Pinot Noir

Upon opening this bottle, the deep scents of black cherry and vanilla fill the room. It tastes sort of earthy, with the dry flavor typical of a red. Probably not my favorite, but there was definitely something sexy about this wine. Like, debating whispering "Pinot Noir" in my boyfriend's ear during date-night sexy time. Say it to yourself, trust me—you'll understand. 

Pink Moscato

Admittedly not a red, but pink is a combination of red and white, right? So I figured I'd finish off with this one. Pink Moscato has a lot going for it, like a sweet, fruity flavor, but the number one benefit? It's. So. Pretty. Just look at the color! And the taste is wonderful—it's not one of Barefoot's top sellers for no reason. If you're trying one out, definitely grab this one.

Are Barefoot Wines Worth It?

In my opinion — yes. Barefoot pretty much produces the safest cheap wine on the market. Sure, you can find three dollar wine, but be prepared to taste something not too much better than your average shot of vodka. But, if you want to get a little giggly but still retain a touch of class, Barefoot has your back. 

P.S. Remember the corkscrew, or you'll end up like me, wearing a pair of safety goggles and wielding some pliers.

Disclaimer: Spoon University does not encourage binge-drinking of any kind. Drink responsibly!