Lifestyle

7 Signs a Healthy Lifestyle Just Isn’t for You

By Kelsey Cahill at University of Richmond

The combination of an intense love for all things fried and a complete lack of self-control isn’t necessarily ideal when it comes to a healthy lifestyle. But it’s something I’ve decided to embrace.

So if your idea of #nodaysoff isn’t about the gym, but about your daily after-dinner bowl of ice cream, then here are a few things you need to know about what it means to be one of us:

1. You are always hungry.

3 am, 3 pm, the middle of class, the middle of the night, it doesn’t matter. You’re always down to eat.

2. You will try anything when it comes to food.

Whether it’s a bacon sundae, fried pickles, or a cheeseburger with donuts for buns, you only have one thing to say: Bring it on.

3. The thought of working out exhausts you.

Whenever you actually make it to the gym, all of the short-lived motivation it took to get you there is gone and you end up spending about 8 minutes on the elliptical before giving up and sitting in the sauna.

4. You have never used the words “count” and “calories” in a sentence together.

You feel no remorse about watching your friends check nutrition labels and log their food into fitness apps because you’re wearing stretchy pants and just ordered mozzarella sticks, so who’s the real winner here?

5. People frequently comment on what you’re eating.

“Why yes, this is my third doughnut, thank you for noticing.”

6. You have never regretted drunk eating.

Only because what you eat drunk is the same as what you eat sober and a Friday night without 2 am Papa John’s delivery is one that is wasted (no pun intended).

7. Everything tastes better than skinny feels.

You have no intention of changing your ways because food makes you happy and that’s the most important thing. And anyone who says they’re actually enjoying their kale salad is a damn liar.

Check out these great articles about not-so-healthy eating:

• 5 Reasons Why the Freshman 15 is Okay
• 6 Foods That Are Undeniably Better Deep Fried
• 9 Thoughts We’ve All Had While Dieting