Liz Lemon has it all — an awesome career, an apartment in New York City, cool friends, a fun boss, and, oh yeah, a great relationship with her inner fat kid.
Listen to Liz and take notes, kiddos:
There is Always More Than One Way to Eat Something
Tired of eating the same thing? Try flipping it inside out, upside down, or even folded in on itself — you’ve just created a whole new food group.
There Are Endless Combinations of Your Favorite Foods
Can’t decide between sweet and salty? Why not pile one on top of the other and call it a day? How else would we be #blessed with something as magnificent as Mac and Cheese pizza.
Food Can’t Send Your Calls Straight to Voicemail
Mom’s not answering? Boyfriend’s not responding to your 37 text messages? Call your favorite food, I bet it’ll be there for you before you can say “sushi.”
The Refrigerator is Open 24/7
No matter what time you get home from the club (or your Netflix binge), you can rest assured that the fridge will be unlocked and loaded, ready for anything you’re about to throw its way.
Food is a Great Outlet to Channel Your Creative Energy
What do you do with all of that pent up creativity when perhaps you’re not the best with crayons? Try coloring with the flavors of food. Mess around with your favorite edible stuff and call it a work of art.
A Man’s Taste in Food Says A Lot About His Datability
Values are important in a man. If he doesn’t value food, especially eating it with you, then it’s probably time to move on. Nobody needs that kind of negativity in their lives.
Food Will Never Interrupt You
Let it all out honey, because no matter how long you bitch and moan, food will be listening quietly, patiently looking back at you with those beautifully delicious little sesame seed eyes.