We’ve all been there. It’s 3 am and somehow you managed to stumble back to your apartment in one piece. You used your last $5 to get into a party only to find out the keg was tapped and now you have one thing on your mind: food. Students at the University of Pittsburgh (and a few special guests) graciously shared some of the most disgusting things they’ve done with food while under the influence.
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1. “This one time I was coming back from a party and I was really hungry, but I didn’t have any money. On the way back to Lothrop I came across this stray dog, and since there are no kitchens in Lothrop I had to eat it raw. I can’t believe there isn’t a single kitchen in Lothrop!”
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2. “I’ll admit to dipping goldfish in a Costco sized container of Nutella shirtless in my room.”
Photo by Taylor Allen
3. “I cracked a raw egg directly into my mouth.”
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4. “One time I spread an avocado over half-frozen pizza rolls.”
Photo by Samantha Thayer
5. “Pickles and ice cream.”
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6. “I had nothing in the house. I was down to three remaining burger buns (a week past the sell-by date) and a restaurant size bottle of Heinz ketchup. I had ketchup sandwiches.”
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7. “One time I took a cold hot pocket out of the microwave at a party and ate it on my walk home.”
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8. “I once tried to make sweet potato puffs in the oven but I got too high and forgot to turn the oven on and my roommate ended up finding them in there the next morning.”
Photo by Isabelle Langheim
9. “A slice of bacon chicken ranch pizza with cheese wiz and a slice of buffalo chicken pizza on top.”
Photo by Abby Wang
10. “Waffles. With no syrup.”
Photo by Naib Mian
11. “One time I thought it to be a great idea to put honey all over my Dominos pizza. The saddest part of this is that I enjoyed it thoroughly and I still to this day slather honey on my Dominos. I must warn you that it only works on Dominos—no other type of pizza.”
Photo by Aarthi Chezian
12. “I got a bacon/cheese dog from the O and the bacon fell on Forbes but I picked it up and put it back on my hot dog and thoroughly enjoyed the rest.”
Photo courtesy of The Daily Beast
13. “How about that time Calvin drank directly from a bottle of olive oil?”
Photo by Jessica Payne
14. “I’m not ashamed to represent those who on occasion eat an entire jar of peanut butter as a meal…”
Photo by Alvin Trusty
15. “I once ate a piece of chalk and chased it with hot sauce.”
Photo by Stephanie DeVaux
16. “Once, WHILE ALONE, I ate pretzels dipped almond butter, (which is a seemingly normal snack) then I proceeded to dip pita chips, pirates booty, stale cookies, fruit snacks, almonds (?) and pizza crust in said almond butter… after I realized what I had done I was so ashamed that poured dish soap in the almond butter (so I wouldn’t eat it out of the trash) and threw it away….. it was a new jar.”
Photo by Lily Allen
17. “I once stole a family sized jar of peanut butter and a container of C4 from a party.”
Photo by Alyssa DiFrancesco
18. “Doritos in cream cheese.”
Photo by Jenny Georgieva
19. “Raw ramen on a paper plate with half the packet of seasoning, otherwise it gets too salty. Delicious really…”
Photo by Caitlin Wolper
20. “A successful date with a bottle of Jack Daniels inspired me to make a masterpiece so I made some bacon. Great start. Then I sliced up chicken and cooked it in the bacon grease. Mixed Uncle Ben’s rice with the chicken and bacon bits. Too dry, gotta have your duck sauce. A lot of duck sauce. To garnish, I threw an uncooked egg on top. I threw up within 10 minutes of eating it. Lesson learned: a bunch of food that is great by itself doesn’t mean it will be great mixed together. And don’t cook when you’re blacked out.”
Photo by Lauryn Lahr
21. “I once knew a dude that woke up cuddling with an Antoon’s box every Sunday morning.”
Photo by Emily Waples
22. “Potato chips dipped in icing…”
Photo courtesy of tastykitchen.com
23. “My friend studied abroad in Japan for a year and when he came back, he brought an assortment of Japanese Kit-Kats for us to try. Naturally I waited to eat them until I was drunk and ended up wrapping a strawberry cheesecake flavored Kit Kat in Sorrento’s crust and dipping it in ranch dressing.”
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24. “I ate pizza with bacon, jalapeno, and cream cheese with soy sauce all over it.”
Photo by Jennifer Cao
25. “I walked into a party and no one was in the kitchen except a lone cucumber on the table. Like any clear-thinking human being, I decided to act out my dreams of being on Chopped and started ninja chopping the cucumber with a large knife. When I heard someone yelling about what was going on the kitchen, I proceeded to walk out the back door and then come in through the front again as if I was never there.”
Photo by Haliana Burhans