As freshman dorm assignments begin rolling in, it’s officially time to start thinking about your dorm room aesthetic. Will you be PBTeen classic? Are you boho chic with an un-ironic tapestry? YAWN.
Make an impression upon move-in and show your hall-mates what you’re really all about: food.
1. A Burger Duvet
Photo courtesy of cafepress.com
Your roomie will be like, “Wow, you sure do love burgers” and you can stare back at them stoically and say, “I get my best night’s sleep under a bun.”
Note: though these pajamas are not a dorm room “essential” you should put them on your list anyway.
2. Fast Food Pencil Sharpeners
Photo courtesy of urbanoutfitters.com
Sharpening your pencil just got greasy (in the best way possible).
3. Mini Donut Maker
Photo courtesy of urbanoutfitters.com
As far as I’m concerned, if you can have a Keurig you can have a donut maker. They’re basically the same thing. (BTW, who knew you could make oatmeal with a Keurig?)
4. Croissant Pillow
Photo courtesy of Gracesmiths on Etsy
I feel like it’s more weird to not have a casual croissant pillow on your bed than to have one. But that’s just me, I guess?
5. Pizza Shower Curtain
Photo courtesy of Kessen Inhouse on etsy.com
Is this shower curtain a little assaulting? It is. However, it will paint a clear picture of who you are as a person.
6. Cinnamon Bun Print
Photo courtesy of ALittleLeafy on etsy.com
This is just the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. “Anaconda” meets cinnamon rolls = the coolest dorm room ever.
7. Hamburger Flask
Photo courtesy of FlaskMart on etsy.com
Ah, yes. There’s nothing quite like ripping shots of Burnett’s in your freshman dorm. If you aren’t taking shots out of a hamburger flask, are you even getting drunk bro?
8. Fried Chicken Soap
Photo courtesy of ajsweetsoap on etsy.com
Yes, you read that correctly. Throw some of this soap in your shower caddy. Everyone will look at you like you are a damn CRAZY person but maybe you’re into that sort of thing.
9. Bread Pushpins
Photo courtesy of Imargienations on etsy.com
So you’re all set with your cork board from Bed Bath & Bae-yond. Silly you forgot pushpins. Look no further. They’re itsy and oh-so-cute.
10. No GMO Mug
Photo courtesy of DecalSerpent on etsy.com
Come in HOT with this mug. Sip and stare at your roommate as they dig into their microwaved ramen meal and JUDGE. Following that awkward exchange, school them in the world of GMOs.
11. Sushi Flashdrives
Photo courtesy of amazon.com
No, your eyes are not deceiving you. These exist.
12. Sushi Clock
Photo courtesy of fakefoodjapan.com
Never run late to class again with a little help from Mr. Sashimi. (Also, deconstructed sushi in a mason jar is an ideal pack lunch for the first day of class.)
13. Pancake Blanet
Photo courtesy of lookhuman.com
Get ready to Netfix and chill with the cutie down the hall underneath this appropriate pancake blanket.
14. French Fry Pillow
Photo courtesy of lookhuman.com
This will go perfectly with your hamburger duvet (see above).
15. Gummy Bear Tote
Photo courtesy of lookhuman.com
Going to class? Grab your gummy tote. Heading to the gym? Gummy tote. Gummy tote over everything.
16. Pizza Lamp
Photo courtesy of reigerdesign on etsy.com
Mmm. Pizza.