Boys: you can’t live with them, you can’t live without them. But when it comes to coffee, there’s no living without it.
To the bitterly single girls, I hope you nod your head in approval while reading this. To girls with boyfriends, I can only hope he has most of these qualities.
And to the boys… Sorry!
1. Availability
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Coffee is available at an any hour and every corner. Is a boy always free for you whenever you want? I’m going with probably not. Just remember that coffee is always there for you.
2. Variety
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With coffee you can choose between hot, cold, shots of espresso, dark roast, medium roast, light roast, international…need I go on? I have yet to meet a guy that I’ve liked who has been both hot and cold with me.
3. Energizing
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Boys have a tendency to take a lot of energy out of you, whether its pacing around waiting for a text back or making your mind run around in circles. Luckily, there’s always a cup of Joe to give you that energy back.
4. Personalized
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If only I could walk into a store and create my perfect boy the way I walk in to a coffee shop and have them create my perfect coffee. Vanilla iced with soy milk, in case you were wondering.
5. Flavorful
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Tired of your average cup of coffee? You can easily ask a barista to throw some fancy flavor in there. You can’t have boys in a yummy pistachio flavor.
6. Dependable
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You can always trust that coffee will get you through a rough Monday, ten page papers, or a fifteen hour work shift.
7. Instaworthy
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Oh, is it basic to take a picture of your coffee? Who cares, Instagram is for pictures, and what’s better than an artsy coffee appreciation post? Plus all those dope baristas with their foam skills… they want you to take a picture of that latte art. Keep in mind that a coffee won’t be camera shy, compared to half the boys out there.
8. Disposable
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HAH, am I right? Say there’s a time where your order gets messed up, no problem you just toss it and ask for a new one. I mean, I guess you can do that with a boy but sometimes it’s not that easy. Boys can be a little heavy to toss in the trash.
9. Warm & Cozy
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Sometimes you just want your personal space and to snuggle up with a warm cup of coffee.
10. Worldwide
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Some coffee beans come from the coolest places ever. You’re basically traveling the world cup by cup.
11. Aroma
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I actually think it’s impossible for coffee to smell bad. Sweaty gym boys on the other hand…
12. Decaffeinated
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Boys can be known for those after midnight texts, you know what I mean? Coffee comes in the decaffeinated option in case you value beauty sleep.
Well, there you have it. Coffee is just the ultimate bae.
Boys get you at hello, but coffee gets you at the first sip.
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