No, we didn’t mishear these lyrics. This is for real, and we just don’t understand.
1. One Week – Barenaked Ladies
“Chickity China the Chinese chicken / You have a drumstick and your brain stops tickin’.”
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Yeah, pretty sure my brain just stopped tickin’ on that one.
2. Truffle Butter – Nicki Minaj feat. Drake and Lil Wayne
“Pretty ladies are you here? Truffle butter on your pussy.”
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Wait, you’re gonna put it where? Beware: this is what truffle butter actually means.
3. Candy Shop – 50 Cent feat. Olivia
“Dance floor jam packed, hot as a teakettle.”
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Well isn’t that lyrical genius.
4. Birthday Cake – Rihanna
“Imma make you my bitch / cake cake cake cake / cake cake cake cake / cake cake cake cake/ cake cake cake.”
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Alright, we got it. Cake. But it’s not even your birthday and cake won’t make me your bitch, so…
5. Diced Pineapples – Rick Ross
“Diced pineapples talking diamonds by the jar.”
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Am I missing something here?
6. Ice Cream Girl – Sean Kingston
“I don’t trust nobody named Frosty the snowman / Frosty oh where you at? / Now ice cream man.”
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Did he just turn Frosty the Snowman into an ice cream man? Doesn’t that make him a cannibal? We’re with you on this one, Tay.
7. Summer Girls – LFO
“New Kids On The Block had a bunch of hits / Chinese food makes me sick.”
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This New Kid on the Block doesn’t get it either.
8. The Sidewinder Sleeps Tonight – R.E.M.
“Baby, instant soup doesn’t really grab me / Today I need something more sub, sub, sub, substantial / A can of beans or black-eyed peas / Some Nescafe and ice cream / A candy bar, a falling star / Or a reading from Dr. Seuss.”
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What is your diet? That shit ain’t substantial. Well, maybe Dr. Seuss is.
9. Rapper’s Delight – Sugarhill Gang
“Have you ever went over a friend’s house to eat and the food just ain’t no good? / I mean the macaroni’s soggy, the peas are mushed and the chicken tastes like wood.”
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How ungrateful are you insulting their mother’s cooking? Also, how many times have you tasted wood?
10. I Love My Bitches – Rick Ross
“Am I really just a narcissist / Cause I wake up to a bowl of lobster bisque?”
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No, you’re just a narcissist. The lobster bisque has nothing to do with it.
11. MacArthur Park – Jimmy Web
“Someone left the cake out in the rain / I don’t think that I can take it / Cause it took so long to bake it / And I’ll never have that recipe again.”
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Why would you ever just leave a cake out in the rain? It’s called a fridge. Also, if you ever find that recipe, let me know.
But when it comes to obscure food references, we all know who the real winner is: Kanye West.
So we gave him his own list.
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Yeaaaaaa, buddy.
1. N*ggas In Paris (with Jay-Z) – Watch the Throne
“That shit cray, ain’t it jay? / What she order, fish filet?”
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That makes no sense Kanye. No one orders that.
2. Gone feat. Consequence & Cam’Ron – Late Registration
“Says she wants diamonds, I took her to Ruby Tuesday / If we up in Fridays, I still have it my way.”
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I’m pretty sure that’s Burger King, Sir.
3. We Don’t Care – The College Dropout
“To n*ggas money is homo, it’s hard to get straight, but we gon’ keep baking ‘til the day we get cake.”
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There is more wrong with this lyric than right. #WTF.
4. Last Call – The College Dropout
“Killing y’all n*ggas on that lyrical shit / Mayonnaise colored Benz, I push Miracle Whips.”
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Who doesn’t want a mayonnaise colored Benz? Perhaps with soy sauce colored interior?
5. Guilt Trip – Yeezus
“Blocka-blocka, blocka, blocka-blocka, blocka / Pour a little champagne, cranberry vodka.”
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At least it rhymes. #KanyeShrug.