Ron Swanson is the ultimate carnivore. If you are vegan or vegetarian, this article is not for you. Ron has a strict set of principles that guide his life, especially when it comes to meat. While he’s not trying to ineffectively run the Parks Department, he spends most of his time drinking whisky and eating meat. He lives the dream, and if you want to find out how to eat meat like Ron, keep reading.
Don’t be afraid to try new kinds of meat
Ron’s favorite kind of meat is the kind that’s in front of him. He usually sticks to what he knows, but he will occasionally branch out from his usual steak.
No side dishes are required (especially vegetables)
Ron rarely eats from other parts of the food pyramid. If someone presents him with a salad, he refuses to eat it because “he is not a rabbit.” Ron is a purist when it comes to meat, so if you’re a salad lover, his lifestyle isn’t for you.
Don’t question the grill master
Ron’s idea of a perfect barbecue is just meat and a grill. He was not very happy when other members of the Parks Department were questioning his ways. If you want to become a grill master like Ron, stick to the basics.
Keep stashes of meat in case there’s a meat emergency
If there’s ever a need for meat, Ron has your back. He keeps stashes of meat throughout the office, so he is always ready for a party. Embrace this spirit by always having a healthy stash of meat in your fridge/freezer.
Make sure people understand how much you can eat
Ron has a healthy appetite and he isn’t afraid to tell people about it. Make sure you know what different portion sizes of meat are so you know what you’re getting. Ron would never let anyone rip him off, so don’t let it happen to you either.
There is no wrong way to consume meat
In Parks and Rec, Ron is always finding new ways to consume meat. From the insane loaded burgers at Paunch Burger to meat specials named after him, Ron has tried them all. If you want to live like Ron Swanson, always try new meat delivery systems.
Never eat any form of vegetarian meat substitutes
Vegetarian meat substitutes may be a healthy alternative, but Ron does not approve of them, to say the least. Ron consumes strictly real meat, end of discussion.
Meat should never be consumed with clear alcohol
Burnett’s isn’t going to cut it for Ron Swanson. Class it up for a night and try having some nice whisky with your meat of choice. For your less classy nights, use these alcohol and dorm snack pairings to guide you.