Before starting college, I was warned of the homesickness, the dorm food, the bad roommate, the drugs I shouldn't be doing (thanks mom). However, I was never warned about how much I would miss my high school sports team.
It took an entire year of college for me to realize how much my field hockey team means to me. It's official, the nostalgia has set in and I miss my team.
The Sweat, The Grime, The Bruises
There was something so liberating about it all: sweat trickling down the nape of my neck, thick bruises that lasted for weeks, the raspiness in my voice after a long game (I was a screamer).
Although in high school I lived a pretty routine and organized lifestyle, on the field I felt alleviated from my own mind; I could focus on the game and nothing else.
The Team Dinners
Team dinners consisted of a bunch of sweaty, ravenous girls, an excess of starchy foods, and an unparalleled sense of community. My dad was shook by the amount of food we shoveled into our mouths; I was proud.
The Fitness
As a busy college student, I can barely drag myself to the gym twice a week. I attribute my high school athleticism to sprints and suicides, timed mile-runs, 2-hour long practices and 3-hour long games.
But above all, I miss the moments of total physical and mental discomfort. I miss the sense of strength and confidence that came from doing something I didn't think I was capable of doing.
The Responsibility
As the captain of my field hockey team, I was looked up to for my athleticism and leadership abilities, as well as my sense of team responsibility. Now a student in college, I'm no longer associated with these characteristics, nor am I responsible for anyone but myself.
The Community
Although I struggled a lot with friends in high school, my field hockey friends never wavered. These women have seen me at my most confident and most vulnerable. I can say with 100% certainty that these relationships will last a lifetime.
In the future, I'll have many more leadership opportunities. I'll find communities of people that support me and uphold my same values. But at the end of the day, it will be difficult to replicate the relationships and experiences I had with my field hockey team.