From dancing, playing volleyball, going to the gym, running and swimming it took me two hip stress fractures to realise that I cannot do everything I love doing. I broke myself and hated myself for getting injured for a second time in a year because it wasn't anybody's fault but my own for not loving myself the way that I am. In this difficult time, I had a lot of struggles not just physically but mentally and along the way I learned how to overcome them and recover.
So, what is a stress fracture?
A stress fracture is an overuse injury. It occurs when muscles become fatigued and are unable to absorb added shock. The bone cracks with the overuse of high intensity exercise for example, running. My body got to the point where it needed three pins to hold my bone together because it couldn't handle my intense workouts.
Hip Surgery at the age 20
I never would have thought that I would have hip surgery at my age. Tears were running down my face as I patiently waited to see my orthopaedic. He walked in, pulled up the X-ray and told me " you need surgery tomorrow." I was scared and my heart was beating so fast. I really didn't know what to think, only that I did this to myself and that it was the only option to walk again. After surgery, I was in the worst pain of my life even with a high dose of pain killers. My hip was numb, I was shaking, and I was still so scared of how I was going to recover from this experience.
How It affected me physically.
From the look of this X-ray it is pretty amazing what doctors can do nowadays. Recovering from such an intense surgery was hard but the benefits of it was that I started walking a week later. I lost all my muscle from my whole leg and it is still taking me a long time to regain strength. After a couple of weeks of recovery, I got the okay to start swimming again so I slowly started to build my cardio up but outside of the water I was still weak and I am still working on gaining my strength back.
How it affected me Mentally
This is probably the hardest part to talk about as I really tried to keep it together before and after surgery. The truth is, going through this was probably the most emotional thing that has ever happened to me. My life before injuries was me being very active and happy to get out of bed to do things. As soon as the pain started, I was scared and didn't want to worry any of my family members and I kept all my emotions in and acted strong even though everybody knew I wasn't myself. I wasn't able to do the activities I loved doing, and didn't even want to see my friends anymore. My hip would be the main topic and it would be the only thing on my mind and I didn't want to talk about it. I look back at photos where I was smiling but really, I wasn't happy. I was in so much physical pain and the first thing that comes to my head is how horrible I looked and how much pain I was in when it was taken.
How I got through it and what I learned.
As I mentioned above, I wouldn't talk to much about how I felt but everybody who cared about me knew I wasn't okay. I couldn't be more thankful for all the support I got from my family members, especially my mother, sister and friends. They are the ones who made me stronger each and everyday by giving me positive energy and letting me know that I will get through this day by day. Throughout this, I learned that listening to your body is the most important thing and letting your emotions out is a good thing because there are people who care about helping you. I am not as fit as I was and I dont think I will ever be.