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Lifestyle

5 Food and Weed Combos Perfect for Every Pothead

Summer is coming to an end and, for most people, it’s the worst time of year. But luckily for those in college, it’s the best time. Welcome week, orientation, move-in, football season — whatever you call it, it’s one big party.

Everyone’s back on campus which means it’s time to have some fun before classes start. No more listening to your parents complain and no more sneaking out of your house to rip a bowl after your little brother falls asleep.

You now have your freedom back and it’s time to make the best of it. Here are five wonderful weed and food pairings to help you kick this semester off with a bang.

1. Spliffs and Nacho Chips

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If you’ve been raging for more nights in a row than you can count, it’s time for a “chill night.” That doesn’t mean you have to stay sober, just don’t leave the house. Perfect opportunity for poker night with the bros. Or, should we call it “toker” night? This calls for some snacks.

What do you call cheese that’s not yours? We all know the answer (#lame, but we had to). If you feel like sharing a spliff with your opponents, why not match it with the ultimate food of nachos? No one really likes greasy fingerprints on their bong, so get the joint out of the way first. That way you’re playing “high” stakes.

If you’re a germaphobe, skip the smoke and put the THC in your nachos with this great BBQ nacho dish, or try any of these nacho recipes. With these kind of ideas, you’re sure to pull in the biggest pot next poker night. Not into card games? Replace the spliff with a bong and breakout the N64 for a fun night of “Donkey Bong.”

2. Post-Workout Protein Vape Shake

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If your drinking habits require some gym time, how do you fit in some weed? Whether you’re enjoying the aftermath of an intramural basketball victory, a light jog, or maybe just an intense sexercise session with the booty call downstairs, weed is the perfect way to wind down after a workout.

What better way to fuel your body than with a protein shake?

Add your choice of bananas, mango, apples, avocado, almond milk, and maybe even some chocolate if you’re feeling adventurous. Screw it, add the rest of the Oreos because you know you’ll probably eat them next time you’re drunk anyway. Sure, it may be a little on the unhealthy side, but you deserve it. If you’re looking for a specific recipe, check out any of these smoothie recipes.

Match this with a nice vaporizer to keep your lungs free from smoke. Your body will feel more relaxed than ever and you’ll have that great night’s sleep you’ve been needing for weeks.

3. Culinary Sesh: Italian Potbread

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Photo by Marci Green

You wake up at 11 and you’ve got nothing to do until tonight’s pregame. What better way to spend the day than cooking some delicious edibles with some friends?

Don’t be confused, my friend. This is certainly not pizza. Just like your older, more sophisticated TA, Brad, Italian flatbread is the superior form of bready, saucy, meaty (or meatless) greatness. If you’re lacking in the bread department, grab that naan bread from the Indian takeout and crisp it up to form your kickass base.

Tomato sauce? Not even. Lay down a thick spread of pesto to match the green in your pipe, and try out this combo of goat cheese, arugula, tomato and pesto. Here is the real trick for all you culinary stoners looking to make your mark on the next Call of Duty party. Marijuana + olive oil = marijuana olive oil.

I know, I know, this seems like a no brainer. But head to the local and pick up some inexpensive toppings like canned tuna or a bottle of capers and you’ll have a proper meal that will keep you going through every frag. Blast some jams and pass around a vape pen while you wait for your masterpiece to cook. That’s productivity at its finest.

4. Pad ‘Thai-m to roll a J’

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Photo courtesy of DepositPhotos

Even if you’re not kitchen inclined, then no worries. Simple is always best, but you need to get your heat on really high to make any of these Thai recipes like a champ. Remember any kind of egg or rice noodles will do, but keep it fashionable with splashes of water to keep your noodles moving.

5. Finals & Indian Food

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Photo by Vinita Saggurti

When finals are around the corner and stress levels are climbing, it’s more important than ever to remember to relax. Just say “namaste” and think about the kush you have waiting for you at home after a long library sesh.

While you’re at it, ring up your local Indian joint and get your curry on. They’re open late and they deliver, so chances are they can be at your door just as you’ve set up the bong and invited your buddy.

This is the best way to cast aside your sleep deprived self and stretch out your chakras.

The best options are always vegetarian, so dig into an Aloo Gobi or Makhani Dahl to satisfy those hunger pangs. And if you’re feeling ballsy, make your own Indian curry. Grab the bong when you’re finished chowing down and send yourself into Nirvana.

Take advantage of being in college. For real.

“College is the least fun time of your life,” said no one. Ever.

If you’re a college student, take a second to appreciate the wonderful time period you are experiencing. Marijuana is becoming legal, and you’re able to consume it in more ways than most people knew existed five years ago. Online classes are an easy excuse to stay in your house all day. It’s okay to admit it: Life is good.

Now, get out there and give these combinations a try, because before you know it you’ll be graduated, reading a similar post like this from a cubicle while living in the “real world.” For now, feel free to go get stoned using these combinations and enjoy the best years of your life.