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Which Type of Pizza You Should Eat, Based on Your Go-To High Heels

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at Duke chapter.

If you didn’t hop on a plane to Miami over spring break, your break, like mine, may have consisted of revisiting your favorite hometown shops and restaurants. Let’s see which type of pizza you should have been eating over break, based on which shoe purchases left your wallet a bit too bare. 

Recently-Trending Heels

Over-the-Knee Heels: Hawaiian Pizza

Just when we thought boots couldn’t get any taller, over-the-knee heels stole the show. Thus, like Hawaiian pizza’s pineapple and ham combo, these heels are unexpected. Neither the heels nor pizzas are for everybody, but both emanate admirable boldness. 

Mid-Heels & Kitten Heels: Margherita 

These heels are reminiscent of those from the early to mid-20th centuries. Only pizza with a rich history is a fitting match. Margherita pizza is named after Queen Margherita (of the Italian Kingdom, of course), who could not get enough of the mozzarella, tomato, and basil covered delicacy in the 1800s. 

Ankle Strap: Wild Mushroom + Truffle Oil Pizza

mushroom pizza
dalecruse on Flickr

Simple and graceful, ankle strap heels work harmoniously with any polished outfit ensemble. Similarly, a wild mushroom and truffle oil pizza takes us away from the endless topping options, and toward something straightforward and elegant: a mushroom and pizza lovechild.  

Lace-Up: Jumbo Slice

late night pizza cheese
Avery Allen

Lace-ups are as playful a spin on heels as jumbo is on pizza. Though these heels are overwhelming at first (“Where are all of these laces even supposed to go?”), like any consumer of a jumbo slice of pizza, you’ll be all smiles by the end. 

Oldies, But Goodies

Platform Peep-Toes: Chicago Deep-Dish 

Nothing about peep-toes — and especially platform ones — is quiet, just like their pizza twin, the edible monster known as Chicago Deep-Dish. If you’ve gone a day in these heels, you know the fierceness they embody, and why one can only associate a pizza as (literally and figuratively) hot as Deep-Dish with them. 

Booties & Wedges: Veggie Pizza

Chic but comfortable, booties and wedges are the savior of all heel-lovers who are not about that end-of-day blister life. Like these calf-saving gems, veggie pizza offers the best of both worlds: the feel-good vibe of something green in your meal, and the wholesome satisfaction of cheesy, bready bliss. 

Classic Pumps: NY Pizza

You love your heels the way you love your pizza: classic. Classic pumps – whether black or nude – and New York pizza have survived the test of time beautifully, and rightfully so.

pizza pizza
Trissa Gurney

In my humble opinion, these pump and pizza pairings are matches made in heaven. If you disagree, though, I leave you with one message: eat whichever pizza makes you feel as good as you look in these heels. After a long day of playing off tripping mishaps, you deserve it. 

Lover of black coffee and firm believer in the healing power of Sriracha. Though admittedly stubborn at times, Susie always tries to keep an open mind about food.