The easiest way I could think of to talk about the Duke-UNC rivalry was to compare each of our players to a type of food. After weeks of consideration in K-Ville, I’ve decided that the food equivalent to our team is a Chipotle burrito – sometimes controversial, but universally famous.
The Team
Read on to find out which player makes up which ingredient of this delicious burrito.
Amile Jefferson: The Meat
The team captain and leader, Amile is the most powerful part of a meal – the meat. He’s always there to energize and pump up the rest of the team.
Grayson Allen: The Black Beans
Grayson represents the black beans. He occasionally can trip up your digestive system, but it’s always unintentional. He’s just trying to keep the team going.
Matt Jones: The Guac
Matt Jones is clutch – like getting free guacamole on your burrito.
Jayson Tatum: The Tomatoes
Jayson Tatum, the least basic player on the team, is definitely the tomatoes. He will drain threes, and is strong inside the pain.
Harry Giles: The Lettuce
Harry Giles is the slightly soggy lettuce – a little limp from his ACL reconstruction, but still important.
Jack White: The Sour Cream
Jack White is the sour cream, for obvious reasons.
Luke Kennard: The Soda
Luke Kennard is the refreshing beverage. It hits the spot after the spicy burrito, just like he reliably hits his shots.
The Bench: Tortilla Chips
The rest of the bench is the tortilla chips. They’re potentially salty they aren’t playing, but the meal isn’t complete without them.
Coach K: The Tortilla
Coach K is the tortilla, keeping the insanely talented (and delicious) players together, uniting them as one.
Bottom Line, #GTHC
There is just really no comparing Carolina to Duke, because we are objectively better. Duke basketball is to Chipotle as Carolina basketball is to Cosmic. They’re incomparable. Because Chipotle always wins, we will win on Thursday.