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Lifestyle

The All-Too-Honest Pros and Cons of Drunk Eating

This article is written by a student writer from the Spoon University at Chapel Hill chapter.

We’ve all done it. Boys, girls, our parents, and even though it’s weird to think about, someday our kids are going to do it too. Drunk eating is potentially the most rewarding and regretted part of a night out. Depending on the level of drunk you’ve achieved, the ability to truly think before you eat may not be present. In the case that you can, here’s a handy Pro/Con list for drunk eating! Choose wisely.

hayden

Photo by Nicole Goldfarb

Pros:

  1. You want it in that moment, and life is too short to deny yourself satisfaction. Drunk eating is a good lesson.
  2. You may combine foods or try things you wouldn’t normally eat because you’re that desperate. Then you’ll love it! Hence widening your food palate…
  3. If carbs help with a hangover…then you’re really just getting a jump start on the healing process.
  4. Drunk eating keeps you from going home with that random person at the bar. You’re night is taking a turn for boring, and they’re started to look good…but then WAIT YOU STILL HAVE THAT LEFTOVER TACO. Taco beats lust, always.
  5. College is your time to be social and live with no regrets! Are you going to tell your kids about the time you stayed home and made a kale smoothie after 30 minutes on the treadmill? Quit calorie counting, get drunk, and eat what you want.
  6. The friendships born out of drunk eating are the strongest kinds of bonds. Chances are you probably won’t recognize the person you were dancing with at the club. But the person you locked eyes with over a hot plate of bacon cheese fries? Yeah, that’s love.
nachos

Photo by Sara Tane

Cons:

  1. All the crumbs in your bed. And the pizza sauce on your pants. And is that hummus in your hair? Ew.
  2. You may steal your roommate’s food, thus inducing hate. “Not remembering” you ate her leftover pizza is no excuse.
  3. But really…what did you eat? Is your stomach okay with handling a potentially foreign substance?
  4. You remember that workout you did? Well, you’re probably going to have do that a few more times before the bloating subsides from last night’s drunk munch. Odds are you didn’t snack on carrots.
  5. Anyone working at a restaurant well after midnight is going to be creepy. Have fun placing that order.
  6. Greasy foods can actually feed a hangover, and the body wants what the body wants. Which is probably fries, cheese fries, cheese bread, etc.
  7. Your beloved bank account! You finally closed your tab at the bar, only to head across the street and buy a large order of nachos. You’re going to be too drunk to turn down guacamole, even if it costs $5 extra.

To drunk eat or to not drunk eat? It really is the question that haunts many of us college students. In the end, there’s no correct answer. Each must choose to follow his or her own heart. And by heart, I mean stomach.

drunkeating

Photo by Nicole Goldfarb

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Kaylee Brown

Chapel Hill